Tales of Expat Life and Musings

Expat Forums: Think of Something New

2011-07-03T21:53:00.000-07:00

Heard it all before?
Photo: Jean-Pierre Knapen

Have you ever read through an expat forum and thought,
"I've read all this before! Stop whinging!"

You know the forums I mean: nothing but expats moaning about the locals, the culture, the difficulty in getting a pot of Marmite or their favourite pop drink. I have to admit that I gave up on general expat forums some years back when I realised how exasperating some expats can be - the ones using forums to let off steam rather than contribute helpfully to a discussion.

There are of course lots of forums and sites you can visit that are full of fabulous, helpful information where you can have a pleasant interchange with other people in the same boat.

Anyway, I read something on Twitter that perfectly summed up my feelings about some expat forums and I wanted to share it with you - it made me snigger!!

On the British Expats forum, an expat in New Zealand (going by the name of Dustybin) posted a discussion entitled "Think of Something New". It starts off like this:

"I've been on (on indeed not on) here for a couple of years now and as with all forums the same old things are brought up over and over again. (If you are ever bored find a vw van forum and start a thread about the nice bull bars on the front of your van and see what happens )

A few examples that spring to mind on expats are:
1. NZ is pants
2. NZ is not pants

These first 2 are normally replied to with either:
1. You are a miserable sod therefore i shall point this glaringly obvious fact out to you.
2. You are far too happy and I am a miserable sod therefore I shall p*iss on your bonfire.

That covers the popular two.
The other themes that seem to circulate weekly are:

1.I have stuff already, will that stuff fit/work/explode in my face/make me the talk of the town and cause the local ladies to want to have my babies, when i get to NZ.
2. I dont have stuff, is there anything in NZ that might possibly be useful or will have to make my household appliances out of bits of twig, moss and spit.
3. I have heard that there are people who may be foreign living in NZ and i may have to interact with them. Is there a way I can avoid this, obviously i want to fit in, but only with people who are the same as me in every way. In fact can i be cloned to save me the trouble of starting conversations with smelly people."

Sounding familiar? Dusty Bin then challenges readers to try a different approach....... If you want to read more go to the British Expats forum page.

Expat Friends - What Are they Worth?

2011-06-29T22:01:00.000-07:00

Friends
Photo: Sanja Gjenero

When you are an expat your social circle is probably quite varied. How long you are living abroad, the circumstances that brought you to a new country and where you are living all contribute to the make-up of your friends abroad.

For my newsletter in June I wrote about the friends you make as an expat and how they compare to the friends you already have back 'home'. Here's an extract:

A recent expat survey conducted by the HSBC concluded that expat life in the Netherlands is not easy. The results claimed that it’s hard to learn the language, make friends and integrate into the local culture and community.

I ran a blog post on it back in May and the comments came pouring in from expats in the Netherlands, as well as Dutch readers.

It seems that many of the readers wholeheartedly agree with the survey conclusions. Making friends with the locals seems to be a real stumbling block and most people find themselves friends with expats, despite the effort they perceive they put in with the local people.

It’s an interesting topic – friendships when you’re an expat. Are they different to the friendships you form if you stay in your home country? Are the friends you make whilst you are abroad as close as the ones you have back “home”? Are they as long lasting? It got me thinking……

You can read the full post here and if you want future editions of the monthly newsletter Expats@Home delivered straight to your inbox you can sign up on the home page of www.thewritingwell.eu.

The Making and Breaking of a House Sale in the Netherlands: Our Two Weeks of Hell

2011-06-26T21:48:00.000-07:00

We have just been through two weeks of hell with potential buyers for our house. The only thing that has kept our sanity in tact is the fact that we have a great estate agent selling our house who is also acting as our "buying" estate agent or aankoopmakelaar as it is called in Dutch.

The concept of having an estate agent that concentrates on selling your house and one that focuses on helping you buy a house is something that was alien to me when I moved to the Netherlands. For the first two houses we bought we only used an agent to sell our house, and we did all the buying 'stuff' ourselves. We learned our lesson..... (for pros and cons of hiring an aankoopmakelaar visit EigenHuis.nl - in Dutch)

With our next planned move we decided to use an aankoopmakelaar and it turned out to be a great move - he had secured us our next house within a few hours (yes, hours!) and we couldn't have been happier. That's what a GOOD aankoopmakelaar brings to the process.

Frustrating? You Could Say That!
Photo: Pop Catalin

Unfortunately, not all aankoopmakelaars are of the same calibre and the one representing our potential buyers managed single-handedly to destroy the chain for all buyers and sellers involved. After two weeks of messing around we threw in the towel and declared negotiations over - with such an agent and a process a house sale was just not worth the stress and aggravation.

The aankoopmakelaar had obviously promised the potential buyers he would get them a certain price at the beginning of the process and tried everything he could to keep that promise - deadlines were not communicated to his clients, he failed to relay price negotiation movements to his clients and lies and dirty games were in abundance. He told our estate agent one thing and his clients something completely different. In fact, he personified the reason why estate agents have earned themselves a bad reputation - at least in the UK anyway!!

Our estate agent was not amused to say the least and it was reassuring to us that our 'buyers' estate agent had horrified our own estate agent with his unusual and deplorable behaviour. To hear an estate agent say "I'm glad that's all over," and "I'm glad that didn't go through," when it doesn't end in a sale is truly a marvel...... He'll be taking the issue further but we're just glad we're out of the process.

We have certainly learnt a lot about the world of estate agents from the last few weeks. Our estate agent explained there is a code of conduct between estate agents, especially in a geographical area, and lying and deception is just not done. Yes, estate agents play games but they don't tell lies and manipulate the process and parties involved. For such behaviour, they lose their NVM status.... if they were good enough to have it in the first place of course...... In a housing market that has already been sickened by the economic crisis such estate agents do nothing to help.

The housing market is a tough one out there for sellers at the moment - BUT this does show that a bad choice of aankoopmakelaar can mean the process ends in disaster for the buyers too (ours wanted to move end of August this year so they have a fun few months ahead trying to make that happen).

Here's a couple of tips if you are looking to buy a house in the Netherlands:

An aankoopmakelaar can be worth their fees and more if they are good - ask around for a recommendation.
Make sure that the estate agent you choose belongs to the NVM (Nederlandse Vereniging voor Makelaars) or the VBO. This means they must adhere to certain standards. Yes, you guessed it, our 'interested party' chose one who is a member of neither organisation and standards were low to say the least......
Make sure the aankoopmakelaar knows the local market you are trying to buy a house in. The one representing our 'buyers' did not and made demands that were instantly thrown out. It didn't make him look very competent or the buyers very credible.
Make sure you don't insult the sellers and get them off side with a ridiculously low opening offer. It doesn't bode well for the negotiation process. Nothing like pissing off the owners of the house you want to call home......
If a deadline is set for discussion, keep to it. Unless the sellers are desperate to move patience and trust in you as a potential buyer will quickly be lost.
It's important that you trust your estate agent and that it clicks between you. Are you getting the full story from your aankoopmakelaar?

And of course if you are looking to buy or sell a house in the Zoetermeer and wider area I can recommend a good estate agent - just send me an email and ask!

Who has more tips? Anyone had a good/bad experience buying or selling a house here?

Dutch Happiness and Part-Time Working: Is It Linked?

2011-06-22T22:12:00.000-07:00

Most Dutch Women choose to work
part-time
Photo: Kurhan

According to the CBS, nearly 75% of Dutch women in the work place work part-time. It's the highest part-time rate in the EU, despite the fact that the Netherlands has the second highest rate of women workers in the EU: 71.5% of Dutch women work.

It's not a new topic. But it remains a fascinating one. The Dutch government began trying to encourage women to take on full time employment with tax incentives in the 1990s. They didn't work. In fact, the tax breaks did exactly the opposite and encouraged women to work even fewer hours.

As a comparison: The New York Times states that 23% of women in the United States work part time. That is a staggering difference. What accounts for this part time working trend?

One theory back in 2009 was that men were holding women back - shorter hours and less pay for women being the result. The UN commissioned a study, only to find that only 4% of women part-time workers actually wanted to work full-time or longer hours. Dutch women are actually happy to work part-time. They don't want additional responsibility in the workplace. They don't want to work longer hours.

So is it that Dutch women are lazy? Would they rather be at home watching Oprah than sitting in the work place? Is a daily visit to the gym more important than an increased income?

No, it's about personal freedom. About being able to make choices about how life is lived. Dutch mothers are not prepared to give up their family time and leave full-time child-rearing to expensive creches or the grandparents. Those without children choose to 'enjoy life' instead of working full-time. The Dutch want a good work-life balance. The Dutch are family oriented and value their leisure time (as anyone living here will validate - sunny evenings and weekends mean that the locals are out in force with their bikes enjoying themselves - not in an office to please the boss).

Women, and their partners, are contented with this Dutch culture of part-time working. And the result? Happy women! In fact, the Dutch generally score high in happiness rankings (in the top ten). Looks like somebody is doing something right somewhere in the Netherlands. Don't you think?

Crikey, That Snail's Got No Clothes On

2011-06-19T22:26:00.000-07:00

A Naked Snail Photo: Antonio Garcia

I was pushing my one year old in his pram whilst my four year was jumping over puddles on the pavement next to us on our way back to infant school after lunch. The heavens had opened that morning and the rain had been continuos since I had done the first school run of the day that morning. In front of us was a mother with a four year old girl dressed from head to toe in pink in one hand and her slightly older brother in the other hand. Suddenly the trip stopped before us and the young girl let out a shriek,

"Ew. Wat is dat mama?" she asked, turning to her mother. She pointed at the ground to a slug.

"Dat is een naaktslak," said her mother laughing. The Dutch word for slug, naaktslak, litterally translates to naked snail. Both children were now laughing. The young boy said,

"Yes, he woke up this morning and forgot to put his clothes on." His little sister giggled. As did I. My four year old looked up at me,

"Nee, toch mama?" he asked, questioning the validity of the boy's statement. The mother continued,

"Yes, he must have been very confused when he woke this morning."

It reminded me just how fabulous the Dutch language can be!

A Letter from the Netherlands Blog - Short Interludes

2011-06-15T22:53:00.000-07:00

Over the last few weeks the odd week has flown by with no posts at all, or only one when I generally as a rule try to post twice a week. It will happen a lot more over the coming weeks I fear so a little explanation and update is due!

The short story is that things are manic. Mad. Busy. Manic.

The long story goes a little like this: Our house is on the market and so we are house hunting. It takes up more time than I would have imagined - it also creates the feeling of living in limbo so my mind is elsewhere most days. The reason for the desired house move? Baby number three is on the way and due in October this year so we need more room. Aside from needing an extra bedroom, it feels like the right time for change. We've been in this house for nine years now, and it feels time to move on. So things are changing everywhere I look.

So time is an issue, focus is some days a problem and energy is certainly playing a role - I'm doing my best to keep all the balls in the air as they say, but some weeks will slip by and the blog may be a little neglected. Normal service will be resumed as soon as normal life is resumed....... so it may be some time before the short interludes disappear.

Country Hopping from the Netherlands

2011-06-14T01:47:00.000-07:00

One of the many things I love about living in the Netherlands is the fact that we can jump in the car and drive to any number of countries - we can be "abroad" without the use of an aeroplane or ferry in no time at all. Given that I am a Brit this is a big thing!

Our latest venture to foreign lands was a two week vacation in Lower Normandy in France. We jumped in the car and off we drove.... well, when I say jumped in the car..

What I actually mean is we spent days accumulating the essentials for a family of four to take with us, had a last minute panicked scramble around at 6 a.m. on the morning of our departure to gather the real essentials such as favourite toys, musical Pooh Bear sleeping aid for my 4 year old, sandwiches, drinks and DVDs......., spent 90 minutes packing the car up, bundled two sleepy, grumpy children in to the car and then hit the road. After ten minutes we stopped to sort the car DVD player out..... an hour later we stopped for a toilet break after hearing "ik moet plassen" fifty times....... you get the picture.

Eight hours after we left our home in Zuid-Holland we arrived tired but relieved at our gite in Longues Sur Mer on the Normandy coast.

The Beach at Longues Sur Mer (c) The Writing Well 2011

Normandy Shop Front (c) The Writing Well 2011

Shell Covered Beach at Port-en-Bessin (c) The Writing Well 2011

View from the Gites in Longues sur Mer (c) Lars van Mulligen

Two weeks later, after a fantastic break, we did the same journey in reverse...... and it was worth every minute in the car.

Have You Had Some Foot Action?

2011-06-08T21:58:00.000-07:00

At 2.30pm on a sunny Tuesday my doorbell rang. I paused the telephone conversation I was having to head to my front door. As I opened the door a flash of blue entered my vision. Two police officers stood in front of my house. My heart missed a beat - the first thought being the worst.... then I noted the smile on the face before me. Bad news isn't brought with a smile, I thought.

A policeman stood before me, in full police jacket and hat, and a policewoman stood a little behind him, giving the impression of loitering in the street. She smiled over his shoulder.

"Goedemiddag mevrouw," he began. And he went on to tell me that they had seen that my kitchen window was open and had rung the doorbell to see if I was in. Baffled I stated the obvious, "Ja, ik ben thuis....." Then he explained.

It's part of a national campaign to warn residents about the risks of burglary if you fail to secure your windows and doors before you leave the house.

Had I not been home but had left my kitchen window open I would now be the not so proud owner of a white footprint shaped note saying,

"This footprint could have been made by a burglar."

Last week alone in the Haaglanden region, police (and volunteers) left 900 footprints in houses to warn residents to secure their houses in their absence.

For more information and prevention tips see the Haaglanden police website (in Dutch) or the special folder.

Expats Meet Dutchies..... Dutchies Meet Expats: A Family Picnic 12 June

2011-06-05T08:51:00.000-07:00

My blog post about the survey that implies the Netherlands is an expat unfriendly country hit a nerve with many of you - especially when it came to the subject of making local friends.

So on this note.. I thought I would share an event with you which is designed to help you meet local Dutch people and vice versa.

On Sunday 12 June, Expat Buddy is organising an "A Family Picnic Affair" in Westerpark in Amsterdam. It starts at 2pm and finishes at 5pm. Bring the kids, a picnic basket and something to sit on and wile the afternoon away in the company of Dutchies and Expats. There's lots of information in the flyer below - and you can find details on www.xllentguidance.com

ExpatBuddy's concept is "We are your temporary best friend" for the difficult period just after your relocation, focusing on the social and emotional distress of moving and making sure expats and their families have someone to support them finding their way around - a network, jobs, recruitment, lifestyle, neighborhood etc. In short, ExpatBuddy.nl is an aftercare service provider.

The company also organises HRM Expat knowledge sessions to create awareness about the emotional state of mind of expats and spouses after relocating - something international companies could certainly benefit from if expat surveys are anything to go by.

So put it in your diary - and maybe I'll see you there next Sunday!

Local or Expat Friends?

2011-05-26T10:31:00.000-07:00

Following on from a blog post I ran last week which generated numerous interesting comments, the latest A Letter from the Netherlands blog poll asks:

How much effort have you put in to making local (as opposed to expat) friends in your host country?

It was a topic that seemed to hit a nerve so it's one I intend to follow up on in future posts!

You can take part in the poll on the right hand side of the blog's home page.

The Effect of WW2 on The Netherlands: History Helping Expats?

2011-05-22T22:17:00.000-07:00

World War II Graves in Normandy, France
Photo: (c) The Writing Well

Heinrich Boere is a former member of the Waffen SS who stood trial in October 2009 in Achen for war crimes and was convicted to life in prison in for his crimes. At the age of 89 he is likely the last Dutch war criminal who will stand trial for crimes committed in World War II against Dutch citizens.

Born to a Dutch father and a German mother, Heinrich was born in Germany but moved to the Netherlands when he was two years old. He volunteered to join the Waffen SS not long after the occupation began.

Between September 1943 and September 1944 he was allegedly part of the Waffen SS death squad (Sonderkommando) responsible for killing around fifty Dutch citizens as reprisal for resistance actions, and in particular Boere was accused of executing three Dutch men: Fritz Bicknese from Breda and Frans Kusters and Teun de Groot from Voorschoten.

Boere escaped from a Limburg prison in 1947 and fled to Germany, claiming German citizenship thanks to his mother’s German heritage. Germany does not hand over wanted criminals to other countries, hence he escaped conviction by the Dutch authorities for many years.

In 2000, the German and Dutch Justice System became once more interested in Boere when he was tracked down and interviewed for a Dutch documentary. He showed no remorse. Years later, he was captured in an interview for the AD saying,

“Orders were orders, otherwise it would have meant my skin. Later it began to bother me. Now I’m sorry.”

In January 2009, it was ruled that Boere was not fit to stand trial due to health reasons. This was overturned later in the same year and he was finally convicted in March 2010.

As a result of the German occupation, the Dutch in their homeland experienced WW2 differently to the British. The war came to the Dutch, and like the French, they lived under German rule in their own land.

Last year I watched Oorlogswinter, a hard hitting Dutch film about the German occupation in the Netherlands. It, and films like it, as well as reading the personal stories of those involved over sixty years ago, provide a real perspective on a major part of Dutch modern history. It’s a harsh, harsh history (see the Rotterdam Blitz or hongerwinter of 1944 as examples)

It’s a history that I wasn’t taught in school (though I did specialise in the French occupation and resistance for my A-level French – the Dutch occupation was mentioned in passing during this study) and a history that goes some way to understanding Dutch attitudes to some things; like why the Netherlands gave up its neutral state after WW2 and was an original member of NATO, the EU and the UN and today hosts the ICTY. It also gives more meaning to the poignant event that takes place each 4th May and the celebrations nationwide on the 5th May.

Learning something about the history, and the influences of historical events, certainly has helped me gain a little more understanding of my adopted home.

Is it something that interests you or do you think it adds no value to integrating into your adopted home?

"Day of the Park" in the Netherlands

2011-05-18T22:53:00.000-07:00

Enjoy the Greenery in your Local Park
(c) The Writing Well

Sunday May 29th is "Dag van het Park" - it's a nationwide event to bring attention to the greenery in your town. The ANWB, local councils and volunteers work together to ensure that your local park looks its best and puts on a host of activities suitable for all.

This is the seventh year the event will take place and the theme for 2011 is "Op avontuur" and suggestions for activities include GPS walks, tree climbing, treasure hunts, survival, hut building - all things sure to get young and old interested.

To find out what is going on in your local park, visit the website.

The Expat Unfriendly Netherlands

2011-05-15T23:12:00.000-07:00

Hard to make friends, difficult to learn the local language, fit into the local culture and integrate into the local community. Does this sound like your expat life in the Netherlands?

According to the Expat Explorer Survey carried out for HSBC Bank International the Netherlands placed last out of 25 countries, making it the most expat unfriendly country you could hope for.

Only 36% of expats relocating to the Netherlands find it easy to make friends here and 55% have concerns about the barriers that the local language put up. According to the survey, expats find the Dutch culture hard to fit in to and integrating in to the local community is far from easy here.

The difficulty of making friends in the Netherlands, particularly with the locals, is a common expat forum topic. Learning the language is a common talking point too but for the Netherlands to score so badly on these points did surprise me.

On the other hand, I did feel like shouting "You see!" to someone who once posted a comment on an article I wrote for the Telegraph. A reader going by the name of "Kingory" commented,

"The Netherlands is about the easiest place in the world to be an expat, the language is really easy if you can hack the pronunciation, English is widely spoken, less than an hour east of London, there are loads of expats there already, and they even have the UK BBC for God's sake!!

Kind of missing the point about trying to integrate I think, but nonetheless you would think that a move to a far flung destination would be tougher than a move to a Western European country.

I would love to hear your thoughts on this. Have you experienced problems getting your social life on track after moving to the Netherlands? Is the culture too much to adapt to? Do the survey results surprise you or confirm your feelings?

Learning Dutch - a Tip or Two

2011-05-11T21:50:00.000-07:00

Gerrie Soede of Poldertaal

For my last Expats@Home newsletter I interviewed Gerrie Soede, a Dutch language tutor in The Hague, to get her viewpoint on the best way to learn a foreign language and of course she gave me some tips for those learning Dutch in particular.

The good news is that, given the right circumstances (and a bit of talent), you could be fluent in Dutch in three years. The bad news is that for some people fluency is something that will never be achieved. However, don't let that be a deterrent if you don't have a natural flair for languages. Gerrie says,

"Don’t give up trying and remember that communication is always more important than perfection. Learning the local language is important to feel at home and expand opportunities."

I asked her what the most difficult thing about learning Dutch is. Here's her response,

"That depends on your level. At each higher level you’ll meet other difficult things. The articles and verbs at level A1; structure of the sentences at level A2 and B1, combination of words later on."

In terms of good resources to learn Dutch? Gerrie is clear that you each student should have an idea about their own learning preferences and what works for them. She explains,

"You need to choose resources that meet your learning style and your goals. And that’s different for any individual. However, I like Code and De Delftse Methode for the first levels of learning Dutch."

To round up, here are some tips from Gerrie to help those of us in a constant state of Dutch language learning:

Invest not only in reading but pay attention to listening
Dare to make mistakes
Invest in learning words and do not think that grammar is the most important
Stop the locals talking English to you by telling them you don’t speak English..... no, seriously - explain you want to practice
Stop translating as fast as possible
Meet native speakers as soon as possible

Most of all, Gerrie explains that it is vital to consider the fact that you are communicating as more important that getting it right all the time. Accept that you’re probably not perfect and you'll feel much more relaxed about learning Dutch.

What not to do on a Danish Beach

2011-05-08T22:40:00.000-07:00

My latest article has been published on Velvet Escape (a brilliant travel blog run by Keith Jenkins). The article is part of a series about unforgettable travel memories and is about being stranded in a car on the beach - it's not something I can recommend you do as part of your next holiday but it certainly went down in the book as a "travel memory". The good news is that, as always, taking precautions can save your butt......

The full article is available on the Velvet Escape blog at http://velvetescape.com/blog/2011/04/what-not-to-do-on-a-danish-beach/

Queen's Day 2011 in The Hague

2011-05-04T23:29:00.000-07:00

Today, I'll let the pictures do most of the talking. Last year I spent Queen's Day in my kraambed with my two day old baby. This year we hit The Hague with a one year old in tow.....

A Street Market in The Hague
Photo: L van Mulligen

Binnenhof with Spatters of Orange

The Passage in The Hague Centre Decorated for Queen's Day
Photo: L van Mulligen

The Wheels Decked Out in Honour of Queen's Day

A Spot of Orange Dipping in the
Binnenhof Fountain

Dutch Flag, complete with Orange Wimpel flying outside the Mauritshuis

The Fair on Queen's Day

Hope you all had a good one too.

All photos are copyright of The Writing Well and may not be reproduced without permission.

Raising Bilingual Children?

2011-05-02T11:21:00.000-07:00

Running on this blog is a poll about whether you, as an expat, have chosen (or will choose) to raise your children as bilingual. If you haven't voted yet, you have three more days........ the poll is to the right of this post.

Helmet Therapy in the Netherlands

2011-05-01T21:33:00.000-07:00

Helmet Therapy - a fairly common sight amongst babies
in the Netherlands
Photo: (C) The Writing Well

Expatica has published my latest article on a topic which will be unfamiliar to most - but it is a process we stumbled upon last year when the Consultatiebureau referred us through to a physiotherapist because my baby had a strong positional preference.

I found it very hard to find much information on helmet therapy (or redressietherapie) in the Netherlands, particularly in English, so I decided to share our story for other expat parents out there.

It is also to enlighten others who wonder why - babies with specially designed helmets is a common sight on the streets of the Netherlands these days.

You can read the full article on http://www.expatica.com/nl/health_fitness/healthcare/Helmet-therapy-in-the-Netherlands_17323.html

Flying the Dutch Flag - and the Orange" Wimpel"

2011-04-27T22:11:00.000-07:00

A Dutch street on Queen's Day
Photo: (c) The Writing Well

It's nearly Queen's Day, which means the flags will soon be out in force in the Dutch streets hanging from house flag poles. We don't have a flag holder on our house, nor do we own a Dutch flag to hang even if we did... but I did stumble upon "general flag instructions in Zoetermeer" on the internet and was quite surprised by the rules around flag flying around here. You can't just get your flag out and start willy-nilly waving it about how and when you want, you know!

For a start there are moments for 'general flagging' (where you and I can wave away) and there are times for "restricted flagging" (only on state building etc). Here are the dates when General Joe Public may proudly fly the Dutch flag from their houses:

30 April - Queen's Day
4 May - Remembrance day (with time restrictions and flag must be flown at half mast)
5 May - Liberation Day
Last Saturday in June - Veteran's Day
15 August - official end of World War 2
3rd Tuesday in September (only in The Hague) - Opening of Parliament

So there you have it. General Joe Public may not hoist the flag for any royal birthdays - you'll only see flags out on state buildings and the like for these occasions.

But wait, there's more. On Queen's Day you may also raise your orange wimpel with the Dutch flag. For non-Dutch speakers - a wimpel is a bit of material shaped like a long neck tie. It's the only use you'll ever get our of your orange wimpel so make the most of it on Saturday.

And that's not it... if the said flag flying day should fall on a Sunday or a Christian holiday then the date for official flag raising may change.....

And there is actually more about the size and colours of the flag, how it should be raised and how it the flags should sit should there be two together. Really. And you thought the Dutch rolled out of bed on any given Queen's Day and just 'put their flag up". Now you know......

Enjoy Queen's Day!

A Busy Week for Brits and Dutch Alike

2011-04-24T21:37:00.000-07:00

Wow - this week has it all going on: my son's first birthday on Thursday, THE royal wedding on Friday, Queen's Day on Saturday and a visit from my dad and step-mum to top it all off. It's all go!

Westminster Abbey in London
Photo: Thomas Stepanow

No Brit could possibly be oblivious to the wedding that will take place on Friday between the crown prince William and his fiancee Kate. You can buy street party packs online (in varying sizes depending on your street size), hats, flags (specifically called waving flags which are not to be mistaken for the non-waving flags), bunting, balloons, royal china, commemorative crystal, jewellery and even... I-Phone cases. All the things you never knew you needed to remember this royal wedding are on sale. But, a huge pro in my humble opinion, living abroad means us Brits miss all this - the shops here are obviously not full of royal wedding memorabilia...... I, like many, like a good wedding but I don't need earrings and a mug for the occasion.

And if you thought living in the Netherlands would mean escaping the wedding itself.. think again - the NOS will be broadcasting live from Westminster Abbey. Whilst it won't capture Dutch hearts like the Willem-Alexander and Maxima union, it's sure to bring in huge audiences. The bad news for Brits abroad is that they won't be enjoying the additional bank holiday that those back home get for the occasion......

And talking of Willem-Alexander and his wife... as I was... they will be in attendance at the big event before they fly back to take part in the celebrations in Thorn and Weert in Limburg for Queen's Day on Saturday. Of course, Queen's Day celebrations are going on across the country and The Hague and Amsterdam have large celebrations planned.

Oven Gloves - One Hand or Two?

2011-04-20T22:20:00.000-07:00

Photo: Michal Zacharzewski

It strikes me as odd that British shops offer a selection of oven gloves that comprise of two square gloves joined together, whereas Dutch shops only offer one glove. I've wondered why for many years but to this day I have no definitive explanation so I'm throwing it open in the hope that someone can enlighten me.

Is it because Dutch ovens are in general so small one hand is sufficient to hold the small tray that actually fits? Many Dutch kitchens only have a small dual function oven and microwave so huge roasting dishes are nowhere to be seen which causes Americans problems at Thanksgiving and Brits untold stress at Christmas when turkeys need to be cooked......

Are Dutch people born with one hand made of asbestos and therefore an inbuilt heat resistance that us Brits just don't have?

Is it a cost saving thing? One glove cheaper than two?

I have an extra wide oven in my kitchen which was already fitted (by a Dutch family I hasten to add) when we moved in and my roasting trays are heavy - using only one hand to remove hot trays or dishes from the oven is asking for a hospital visit. That's why I import my oven gloves from England.......

Am I alone? Do one handed oven gloves work for everyone else? Answers on a postcard......

Beating Expat Career Barriers - Ten Top Tips

2011-04-17T21:45:00.000-07:00

Photo: Laura Leavell

To round the expat career series up I would first like to thank the participants who have shared their career stories over the past few weeks. I end the series with a summary of the top ten tips from their stories.

If you are moving or living abroad but want to ensure that your career remains intact in some form or another, here are ten pointers to consider:

Think creatively and outside the box. You may need to rethink your career path but with creative thinking you can end up going in a surprising and fun, albeit new, direction.
Assess your current skill set and ask yourself how you can use those skills in your host country, or how you can adapt them to fill a local need. Jo Parfitt's "A Career in Your Suitcase" is a great resource to help with this exercise.
Sieze opportunities that come your way - listen to people around you and use your network to identify gaps. Sarah Johnson's career story is a great example of listening to people you meet in the most unlikely of situations.
Use the experience you gain as an expat as a basis for your overseas career. Both Nicola McCall and Louise Wiles demonstrate how you can make this happen.
Think about retraining or brushing up your skills. There are many long distance learning programs out there to help you.
Be realistic about your career options when you move overseas as the barriers can be numerous: recognition of pre-existing qualifications, local language, work permits, local culture, job market, legal requirements. Start your research before you leave home.
Make your career portable so that you can take it with you should you relocate.
Don't underestimate the support you will need to keep your career on track overseas - check with your partner's employer of they will support any retraining or if there are any local schemes to help you.
Build up a network that can point you in the right direction, brainstorm with you and offer you feedback and tips.
Stay positive!

Sorry, I'm British!

2011-04-13T21:53:00.000-07:00

Photo: Les Powell

Wheeling my trolley around Tesco in England a few weeks ago, I was struck by the number of times people said sorry to me as they bumped in to me in some form or another. Shop workers careered around the store with huge trolleys to stock shelves, intent on getting the job done rather than giving customers right of way and the room to actually get their shopping done. Much as happens in my local Albert Heijn. The difference in England is that those behind the trolleys smile and say sorry as they push their way through.

"Oh, how polite," I thought. However, after half a dozen incidents from shop workers and customers alike it started to get a little old. Could so many people really mean that they were sorry for pushing their way through or bumping in to me? Not likely. It's a stop word. It's a way of making it all seem a little more polite than it actually is. It's false politeness.

As English people, it is a habit and quite normal to say sorry if we bump into each other - even if it's not our fault. We just say sorry. It slips out without even realising it. It's a well known phenomena. Kate Fox wrote about it in her great book, "Watching the English". Michael Harling refers to the trend in his book about living in England, "Postcards from Across the Pond". We're famous for it.

But during my last trip back to England, I realised with a jolt - it doesn't make it right. The Dutch barge their way through but don't apologise for it. The English push through whilst apologising. False politeness? An example of Dutch directness? It's definitely a baffling cultural difference!

The ins and Outs of Expat Careers: Nicola McCall and A Tale of Adaptation

2011-04-10T22:08:00.000-07:00

Nicola McCall calls the Netherlands
home for now
Photo: A van Mulligen (c)

British born Nicola McCall currently calls the Netherlands her home. Nicola’s life as an expat has been the consequence of her partner’s career – his employer has relocated the McCall family a number of times over the years.

Like Louise Wiles featured two weeks ago, Nicola is an expat coach. Whilst living abroad, her career and the development of her own career has been inspired and created by her own personal, expat journey. It has been a story of adapting.

Before Nicola moved overseas for the first time she worked in an international retailer’s headquarters as a Senior Human Resources (HR) specialist. She was responsible for employee relations, internal communications and employee engagement. With her move abroad, she formed a plan for her future career and actively pursued it. She explains,

“I intended to return to HR on our repatriation to the UK (which was planned for Summer 2006) so I did a UK University Post Graduate Certificate in Personal and Business Coaching, as this was a skill set being sought by HR functions at that time.”

But as we know, things don’t always work out the way we plan. Nicola found herself having to adapt when the family ended up staying abroad. She says,

“During the training I saw the potential to work with expatriate spouses in similar circumstances to my own and inspired by Jo Parfitt’s Career in Your Suitcase website and books, I decided to start my own expatriate coaching business in March 2006.”

There was a serious financial cost attached to this career shift.

“Retraining and accommodation costs whilst studying were in the region of £4,000. I had some career support allowance from my partner’s employers but the majority of the finance for my career change was personal,” explains Nicola.

She also needed other types of support to effectuate her desired career change,

“I could not have done the training in the UK nor home study without my partner’s support to care for our son. I also had support from my course colleagues, expats for practice and a mentor coach to help me complete my studies.”

However, the fact that Nicola is still living overseas five years later with a successful career of her own is testament to the fact that the personal investment was a worthy one. Her hard work and determination have paid off in the long run.

To all potential expat coaches out there, Nicola has some sound advice,

“There are many coaches coaching internationally so make sure you undertake training that gives you a qualification and accreditation that is internationally recognised. Join a professional association to support your continuing professional development. Look carefully at what your niche is and don’t be surprised that you may actually attract those outside your niche in the first year!”

She encourages anyone who has an idea for their own business to give it a go. Nicola says,

“If you think you can – you can!”

To make a success of your overseas career, Nicola pinpoints an essential trait to help you keep going in the face of adversity,

“You need persistence. It is common to ask “why am I bothering?” particularly when you are facing the uncertainty of a new location, you are juggling family commitments, learning a new language, studying – in short creating a new life in a new location! But persistence will keep you on track.”

She also stresses the importance of a sound network and contact with peers.

“Asking for help and reciprocating when you can is one of the easiest ways to connect with others in a similar field – I believe it is part and parcel of networking,” she tells.

And finally, in Nicola’s opinion, a successful overseas career needs a dash of something extra,

“You need a sense of humour – it’s essential anywhere, anytime!"

Nicola's Recommended Links
Inspiring Expat Women sites and books:
www.expatwomen.com - information site covering expat women’s lives abroad
www.expatexpert.com Robin Pascoe (see also her books)
www.joparfitt.com & www.career-in-your-suitcase.com Jo Parfitt's resources for expat careers

Expat Entrepreneur: How to create and maintain your own portable career anywhere in the world - by Jo Parfitt

containing a useful chapter on careers as an expat woman

Becoming a Coach/ Expat Coaching
www.expatcoachassociation.com
www.coachfederation.org/research-education/icf-credentials
www.associationforcoaching.com/home/index.htm
Useful article from 2003 the Pathways and Pitfalls of Coaching -
www.associationforcoaching.com/pub/Path0312.pdf

Career information
http://www.johnleescareers.com/ - you can register on the home page for access to career tools

Networking

www.twitter.com

Nicola McCall

Nicola McCall MCIPD is a UK University Post Graduate qualified Coach, specializing in coaching expatriates to find fulfillment during their work and life abroad. Visit www.livelifenowcoaching.com for more information.

Expat Harem Guest Post - Rude Honesty: When Politeness is Cultural

2011-04-06T21:38:00.000-07:00

Living in the Netherlands has forced me to be a little less sensitive about the things people say to me. This is because the Dutch tell it as it is and as a Brit that really is an alien concept. Us Brits like to bumble along putting things in a polite way so as not to hurt someone's feelings. It often means the real message is lost somewhere in the middle of the conversation. The Dutch see it differently - why waste time saying things in an indirect, insincere manner? When politeness is culturally ingrained it can certainly present a cultural conundrum for some expats......

I wrote a guest post for Expat Harem on this topic - what do you think? Polite lying or rude honesty?

The Ins and Outs of Expat Careers: Sarah Johnson and Teaching with a Twist

2011-04-03T22:07:00.000-07:00

When her husband got a job with Nike in Hilversum, the Netherlands, Sarah Johnson left her teaching job in the UK to join him just across the North Sea.

For all intents and purposes, Sarah found that a move abroad brought with it the loss of her career. However, Sarah was eventually able to use her core skill set to blow new life into her career abroad. She explains,

"I was a teacher of Modern Languages (French and German) at a secondary school in the UK and now I teach Dutch to adults."

Instead of working in a school, Sarah works privately from her own home. She tells why she chose this route,

"I would never wish to teach in a Dutch school. Discipline is seen very differently and I therefore never tried to get a job in a school."

To redirect her career, Sarah used her existing teaching skills and concentrated on a niche group; namely foreigners living in her local area in the Netherlands who wanted to learn Dutch. She explains how the idea came about,

Sarah Johnson's expat career took
an unexpected turn
at toddler swimming
Photo: Jeremy Doorten

"It was purely down to a friend asking me - 8 years ago now. She heard me speaking to some dutch mums whilst we were at toddler swimming and asked me. I laughed, but then reflected on it and put out feelers to see if anyone would be interested. My Dutch was fluent, in that I could hold a conversation about anything, but certainly not to the level I can speak nowadays - although I'm still not faultless. My first student was Spanish, oddly enough, and then my British circle of students started."

What Sarah has pursued is quite unusual. Language teaching abroad typically focusses on teaching your native language to locals, but Sarah has turned that idea on its head to support non-natives to learn the local, foreign language.

There is, as often is the case, a but. Sarah's career abroad has not been straight forward. There has been soul searching and she followed a downward slope before she picked herself up and got back on track.

"When we first moved to the Netherlands I went into customer services briefly until having our first child. After that, I lost my way and didn’t know how to get back on track. When I hit my all-time low, I decided to write a book about how I was feeling. Through many twists and turns of fortune, and through taking opportunities when they presented themselves, I found myself teaching Dutch to non-natives," she says.

Sarah started with one student and built up her client base gradually until she was teaching eight lessons a week. And then she took it a step further,

"In August 2009 I formed my company “Building Blocks Multilingual” which is becoming increasingly successful. Instead of teaching hourly lessons on a weekly basis I am now offering intensive courses, which are proving to be popular. My aim is to get the language system – Blank Canvas – that I have devised and developed myself, which makes learning languages more straight forward, into schools across the globe.

Sarah Johnson shows that thinking outside the box and making the most of a creative mind and opportunities really can pay off.

Sarah Johnson

Sarah Johnson is a language teacher and the creator of Building Blocks Multilingual.
You can contact her on 035 623 2746 or on her mobile 06 25 52 30 85 or send her an email at johnsons1 at mac dot com

She blogs her novel under the writer's name of Summer Knight. In her own words, Sarah explains,

"It details the difficulties I encountered in a different country, having lost my career to all intents and purposes. I try to post a chapter every week:

http://metamorph2010.wordpress.com/"

Driving Through Four Countries - An Exercise in Self-Preservation

2011-03-30T22:30:00.000-07:00

I recently travelled back to the UK for a visit. We went by car using the Eurotunnel and hence travelled in a number of countries in one day: the Netherlands, Belgium, France and England. And the different driving 'styles' struck me.....

A12 in the Netherlands
Photo:L van Mulligen

It's not the first time I've mentioned it, but the Dutch do tend to like to stick close together on the motorway in the fast lane. It's called tailgating and it's actually illegal. Luckily most Dutch drivers who tailgate don't know this or simply don't care - and there aren't many police around to remind them on the motorways so it happens. It happens a lot. In fact it was actually pinpointed as the biggest annoyance for Dutch road users in 2010. Presumably it annoys the majority of Dutch drivers who think some distance between them and the car in front or behind is sensible and not those who glue themselves to the bumper in front. So that was my most notable observation on the Dutch motorways.

Then we passed into Belgium. You can usually tell that you have crossed the border as the quality of the road surface deteriorates dramatically. And as you jiggle your way down the motorway, something becomes very apparent. Belgian drivers are mad. They make Dutch drivers look tame. They tear down the fast lane with disregard to any speed limits (I learnt that foreigners caught speeding are treated severely by the police whereas the locals are not really bothered by law enforcement officers until they travel at the speed of space shuttles...) and they criss cross lanes as if they are the only vehicle on the road. Something worth watching out for in Belgium are cars with only five figures in the licence plate - these are drivers who obtained their driving licence with a pack of milk many decades ago (or at least they didn't have to take a driving test) ..... and the cars usually show much evidence of this.

Then we hit France. What redeems French drivers is that any driver probably looks good once you've escaped the Belgian roads unscathed. However, the French do something that none of their neighbours do - they keep their indicator on in the fast lane to let you know that they need to get past and they are not just using the fast lane to overtake - they are using the outer lane as their very own personal road to get to their destination as quickly as possible. Therefore, you really need to move over because they have priority. And there is no point just putting your ticker on - you're a foreigner and you still don't have 'fast lane priority'.

And then you drive onto the Eurotunnel train and marvel at how you've made it so far. It's time to sit and relax for the short trip under the Channel to Folkestone before your journey takes you on to the British motorways.

And then you notice the middle of the road attitude of English drivers. They sit in the middle lane of the motorway for no apparent reason. To legally pass them from the 'slow' lane you have to cross over to the 'fast lane' and then cut back to the furthest left lane. And they remain oblivious to the fact that they are causing mayhem around them as drivers criss cross to pass them. Some pass on the left, others on the right, but to no avail. I eventually worked out that some English drivers believe you have to pick a lane when you join the motorway and stick to it - no matter what. Horns. Lights. Cutting them up. None of it works.

So there you have it - Van Mulligen's observations of some of Europe's main highways. You have been warned.

The Ins and Outs of Expat Careers: Louise Wiles and Expat Coaching

2011-03-27T21:55:00.000-07:00

Photo: Enrico Corno

Born in the UK, expat coach Louise Wiles now calls Portugal home but this is far from her first stop on the expat express train. She moved to Spain a decade ago and then to Portugal before she repatriated back to the UK for three years. She then lived on Madeira Island for five years before landing last year in her current destination of Lisbon.

All this moving around is a result of her husband's career. But what about her own career? How has she kept it going with all the moving around and what advice does she have for other accompanying partners? I spoke to her to find out and discovered the expat career path is not always a straight one - but planning the journey is essential.

I asked Louise about her career starting point and what effect a move overseas had on her career. Louise explains how she turned a move overseas into a career opportunity,

"My original profession was in sales and then training in Sales and Management. When I first moved to Spain I considered working for the same insurance group, AXA, in Madrid but decided I wanted to do something different. I trained as an English teacher (TEFL) and had my own business for a year. Then I decided it was my opportunity to do what I had always wished I had done and study Psychology."

Louise saw a move overseas as the chance to retrain
through distance learning
Photo: Shho

Whilst living in Spain, Louise obtained a Psychology degree from the Open University in the UK and followed it with a Masters in Occupational Psychology from the UK based University of Leicester. Both of her degrees were obtained through distance learning.

However, having obtained the qualifications, expat life posed another challenge. Louise explains,

"A big issue was how to get the qualifications recognised here in Portugal. Because I was moving around I never completed my three years practice work in order to become a chartered occupational psychologist."

When Louise left the UK for the second time, she went armed with a plan,

"I chose to complete a certificate in coaching and to build a business from home – portable and related to my experience as an accompanying partner."

Her portable career solution not only works with her mobile lifestyle, but it also helps keep the balance in her home life. Louise says,

"Running my own business also means that I am able to fit it alongside my other commitments as a mother of two young kids with a husband who travels a lot – my business needs to be run from home and flexible enough to work around the demands of two young children (8 and 5)."

Many expats face a similar need to maintain flexible working arrangements - and Louise has created her own solution.

I asked Louise what kind of support she has had to build and maintain her own career abroad. The answer is disappointingly typical for many accompanying spouses.

"None – from any outside party – just me and support financially from my husband (well our family income!!). Actually I think I did get financing for a language course and my TEFL course in Madrid from my husband's company during our first relocation – but I've have had no support since," shares Louise.

This lack of support in her own situation is the reason why Louise is developing a programme for accompanying partners which aims to identify and develop a portable solution for their lives abroad.

Louise's number one tip for others who want to pursue their career abroad is simple,

"Do your research before you leave your home country. Make sure your expectations are realistic before you move abroad."

She goes on to say,
"Check whether your home country qualifications are recognised in your destination country and if they are not investigate what you will need to do to convert them – if this is possible. If not, consider how you could build your own business or freelance whilst abroad. Think about how you would set up a business and what the requirements for registering that business abroad would be – you may not even be able to do so in which case consider setting up your business in your home country before leaving. You could also consider working as an associate for someone else."

I asked this creative expat coach which three skills she thinks are essential for the success of an overseas career. She says without hesitation,

"Determination, creativity and passion."

Louise's Recommended Links

The Expat Coach Association

The International Coach Federation

Get Ahead by Going Abroad:
A Woman's Guide to Fast-Track Career Success
by C Perry Yeatman and S Nevadomski Berdan

Career in Your Suitcase by Jo Parfitt - a recommended read by Louise Wiles

Louise Wiles offers specific programmes for accompanying partners who want to create an individual portable approach to their career and lifestyle on relocating abroad.

To find out more about Louise and her services visit her website: http://www.SuccessAbroadCoaching.com or contact her by email

Louise@SuccessAbroadCoaching.com. You can also follow her on Twitter: LWexpatlife

Expats@Home - Monthly Inspiration from Expert Expats

2011-03-23T22:45:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't yet know about the Expats@Home newsletter I send out every month, this post is just for you.

Photo: Ilker, Turkey

I called The Writing Well newsletter "Expats@Home" because I felt that one of the main struggles of living overseas is feeling like home is always somewhere in the middle. By that I mean the longer you live away from your birth country, the less it feels like home every trip back you make. For most people a host country however, is also never 100% home because there is a different culture, language, climate or way of living, which never quite fits entirely. For me personally, whether I am in the Netherlands, which I do now consider my home, or whether I am back in England, there is always a little piece of the puzzle missing.

Delving into the local culture, language and society always helps you to feel a little more at home than staying on the outskirts. And that is what this newsletter is about; sharing the experiences of life as an expat, tips I have picked up from my journey as a foreigner in the Netherlands or learned from others - all so that others may feel a little more like an expat at home.

This year, I decided to team up with some expat experts to share top tips with you about getting the most out of expat life. Kate Berger shared her wisdom in February and Tara Agacayak shared inspirational words about creative careers this month. Next month, Gerrie Soede, a Dutch language teacher, shares top tips about learning a foreign language.

You can sign up for monthly inspiration at http://www.thewritingwell.eu/

The Ins and Outs of Expat Careers: From Human Resources to Writing

2011-03-20T23:00:00.000-07:00

This is the first post in the series about expat careers. To kick off the series I thought I would share my expat career experience with you.......

I moved from the UK to the Netherlands in 2000 and at the time I was a Human Resources (HR) professional. I had studied for a Post Graduate Diploma in HR Management and intended to continue practicing HR when I moved abroad.

Within two months I had a new job with a large international company in a HR role. But to start earning again I’d made many compromises. The position was lower than my UK role was, the salary less. It was a temporary role and working through an employment agency.

Despite the number of international companies based in the Randstad in the Netherlands I found that the job market for my niche was relatively small because my Dutch was nowhere near good enough to work in a Dutch company – and that reduced my options considerably.

Feeling insignificant in a big
office block
Photo: Ryan Smart

After years of working on a specific contract in the same company, having been given a permanent, direct contract with the company the project came to an end and I was moved within the organisation to another team. It went downhill from there. I felt like a number not a valued team member, a face in the crowd. I started reviewing my career options. I needed creativity in my daily work life. I wanted to write for a living but didn’t really see how.

I considered how I could combine HR and writing and then I discovered Jo Parfitt and attended one of her courses. It was the springboard that took my career on a new direction. During the course, Jo made a general statement to the group which stuck with me,

“You can make a career of writing and you can earn well with it. But you need to be passionate about what you are doing.”

I knew I wasn’t passionate about HR anymore. It hadn’t fulfilled any of the hopes I’d had, especially for much of my time in the Netherlands. But I was passionate about writing.

When I went on maternity leave it was the opportunity to take stock and make the change. I never went back to my HR role nor the international company. I set up The Writing Well instead.

The main barrier was financial but my departure from my former HR position left me financially secure for a number of months so I had a safety net – plus the income provided by my husband’s role gave us enough security to support the inevitable drought times.

Setting up a business in the Netherlands turned out to be straight forward, particularly given the nature of my company. I visited my local Kamer van Koophandel (Chamber of Commerce) to register The Writing Well and then registered the company with the Dutch tax office. That was the administration taken care of.

I undertook a web design course with NTI so I was able to design and build my own website for the launch of The Writing Well. And then I began networking and producing articles for various expat websites and publications – for free.

It built up my name and portfolio and then paid work started to steadily flow in.

A while after I started writing, I started a distance learning course at the London School of Journalism to boost my professional skills and keep my personal development going.

For expats wanting to make a move into the world of writing, my advice is this: choose a niche, know your market and grow your networks.

Working virtually is vital if writing is your chosen
expat career. Photo: Maripepa

Grow a platform for yourself (or as Anastasia Ashman and Tara Agacayak call it – a global niche). Writing is a great expat career because it is portable. Your clients can live across the other side of the world and it makes no difference so long as you can work virtually in an effective manner. I would also add that you should make the most of distance learning courses.

You do need the support of those around you. My husband enables me to take the time to disappear into my home office and work because he takes on the household and looking after the children. He has motivated and supported me from day one and even before – and takes an active role in decisions I make, and activities I undertake relating to my business. Jo Parfitt has also been a great support over the years – somebody who remembers her network at every possible chance and points clients in the right direction.

To succeed in a career overseas I think you need to be able to effectively network, both virtually and face to face. You need to be passionate about what you are doing and it certainly helps to be creative – to think outside the box. Finally - believe in yourself.

Useful links for an overseas career in writing:

www.joparfitt.com
London School of Journalism

Here are just some of the websites that welcome articles which enable you to build a portfolio -

www.expatica.com

www.expatarrivals.com

www.iamexpat.com

www.expatwomen.com

www.expatexchange.com

And for inspiration to build a creative career doing what you love, no matter where you are visit Tara Agacayak's site - Turquoise Poppy.

Next week Louise Wiles shares her expat career story.

A Lotta Bottle - Recycling in the Netherlands

2011-03-16T23:24:00.000-07:00

Photo: Martin Boose

Last September, expat American author Bill Bryson called on Britain to return to the bottle recycling of old to save resources and reduce littering. Until the end of the 1980s this was common practice in the UK and for every bottle of drink you bought you paid a penny or so extra and got it back when you returned the bottle. In fact, I can remember the 'pop' man coming round the streets with his lorry and we'd regularly get our bottles of drink from him in a plastic crate and the bottle deposit was a normal thing. Ach, those were the good old days of dandelion and burdock in a glass bottle delivered to your door.

And then plastic bottles and cans increased in popularity and the bottle deposit system died out in England. Instead there are kerb collections for recyclable materials such as cans, plastic and paper. Bill Bryson's comments however seem to have reopened the debate.

According to the Recycling Netwerk, 90% of beer bottles with a deposit on them are brought back by shoppers in the Netherlands. The system works here just fine, at least from a consumer point of view. One of the concerns about re-implementing such a system in the UK is that shoppers will have to pay a bit more for their drinks and not everyone will be able to get back to the shop they bought the bottle from - the Netherlands has an answer.... a universal system so you don't have to return to the exact shop you bought the bottle from. You can even turn in bottles bought in other countries in some cases - that beer you buy in the Belgian supermarket for example is often accepted in Dutch bottle recycle machines. Small beer bottles have a statiegeld (deposit) value of 0.10 cents, large beer bottles 0.25 cents and a full crate earns you back your 3.95 euro.

There has been pressure on the system over the past few years - for the same reason the system in the UK stopped - because of the increasing market share of cans and small bottles which are not subject to the statiegeld scheme. However, this may change to meet plastic recycling targets set for the Dutch government by including small plastic bottles in the scheme. Maybe that will also help the littering problems around schools.....

What has surprised me about recycling in the Netherlands is that cans are not recycled and in my area the recycling of general plastic packaging has only very recently been introduced. Both materials have been standard in the UK for many years now. Different everywhere you go it seems.

What do you think about the bottle deposit system? Is it in force where you live? Does it help the litter problem?

The Ins and Outs of Expat Careers

2011-03-13T22:55:00.000-07:00

Photo: Vera Berard

Next Monday a new blog series begins on "A Letter from the Netherlands" about pursuing a career when you live abroad.

Particularly for accompanying partners, and those who move overseas to live with a local, this subject is a thorny one. For some, moving overseas is the perfect opportunity to make a career change and take a risk doing that one thing they always wanted to do. For some an expat life opens up doors. Others find doors slammed hard in their face.

The reasons for being unable to pursue your current career abroad are varied: lack of work permit; qualifications not being recognised; no jobs available in the local arena; cultural differences; legal restrictions; retraining needed; safety reasons; language barriers..... and so it goes on.

But it's certainly not all doom and gloom as our interviewees will reveal. A move overseas is a tremendous career opportunity for those who can think outside the box and put their creative being to work.

Over the coming weeks I will be speaking to a range of expats in different countries about their careers and how a move overseas effected their working lives. They'll share their experiences and give tips and advice and share links and resources that have helped them along their expat career journey.

If you have an expat career story you would like to share, please send a mail to "amanda at thewritingwell dot eu" and I'll let you know how.

On the subject of expat careers, the March edition of the Expats@Home newsletter goes out tomorrow with guest expert Tara Agacayak telling us about creative careers. You can found out more and sign up at http://www.thewritingwell.eu/Newsletter.html.

Expat Challenges by Kate Berger

2011-03-06T21:45:00.000-08:00

Kate Berger, an expat expert
specialising in helping expat kids

For the Expats@Home February newsletter, I asked expat expert, Kate Berger, to share a little about some of the challenges that face expats. She interviewed some local expats from different countries and shared them with us. The result was interesting with issues ranging from how to make friends to ensuring that your retirement plan can sustain you in later life.

Kate Berger offers emotional health services for expatriate children and adolescents in the Amsterdam area through her practice, The Expat Kids Club. Individual and group sessions are offered, and target issues including anxiety, family & peer conficts, and socio/emotional adjustment to non-native lifestyles & cultures. For more information visit http://www.expatkidsclub.com/index.html

If you want to read the article in it's entirety visit the archive. If you want to sign up for future editions of my newsletter visit my website page.

The Smoking Ban in the Netherlands

2011-03-02T21:54:00.000-08:00

Photo: mi-sio

My very first blog post, back in June 2008, was about the new smoking ban that was being introduced the following day in the Netherlands. Fast forward to today.

The smoking ban has proved to be rather a thorn in the side of the Dutch government. There has been much discussion about the fact that those bars clearly defying the ban over the last few years faced no consequences. Small cafe owners threatened to sue the government for lost earnings from the smoking ban.

Balkenende's government held fast. But then the latest coalition government came in and rescinded part of the law so that owners of those bars up to 70m2 with no employees are free to allow smoking in their premises. Fines for violating the smoking laws in these establishments were also cancelled. Clean Air Nederland collected 35,000 signatures against lifting the smoking ban in some cafes.

For those places where the smoking ban is still alive and kicking, there will be higher fines, stricter checks and enforcement of the law.

In a nutshell, it's a heated discussion in this country - even though the law came into being nearly three years ago. The Netherlands is the first country in Europe to actually reverse a smoking ban. The Dutch HEALTH minister put the reversal down to "consumer choice".

One of the striking differences in the Netherlands is that the ban was not introduced to protect the public from passive smoking but as an extension of the law to protect employees in the workplace, hence bar owners with no staff could challenge the introduction of the law.

Interestingly, restaurants seems to have taken the ban in its stride.

It has all been a bit of a mess and for some reason the Netherlands has faced a difficulty getting a smoking ban implemented that seems to have passed other countries by.

The EU is looking for wider and stricter measures from the member states to reduce the effects of involuntary inhalation of second hand smoke - particularly regarding children and adolescents. At present in the Netherlands around a third of schools ban smoking on their schoolpleinen. Health Minister Schippers wants this to become a total ban and will come with a proposal this spring. I'm assuming that schools won't be as difficult as bar owners to convince that smoking on the school playground should be stopped......

It will certainly be interesting to see how the Netherlands handles any further ban in public areas.

What are your thoughts on how the smoking ban has been handled in the Netherlands?

Michelin Stars in the Netherlands

2011-02-27T21:23:00.000-08:00

Photo: Noel Abejo

Forget bitterballen and kipcorns.... there is much more to eating out in the Netherlands. Inspired by my recent post about Top Chef I delved in to the topic of Michelin star restuarants in the Netherlands and was surprised by the sheer number scattered across this small country.

There are two restaurants in the Netherlands who have the prestige award of three Michelin stars" Oud Sluis in Sluis, Zeeland (also voted best restaurant in the Netherlands) and De Librije in Zwolle (which was featured on BBC's Masterchef last year). Both restaurants and menus look good, though your wallet does need to be quite full.......

There are 13 two star restaurants spread across the country and 83 three star establishments - you can find a complete list on dinnersite.nl.

In 2009, I wrote about a restaurant in Limburg which actually gave back its Michelin star as it was keeping customers away. Now known as Eten bij Michel, the restaurant underwent a redesign and provides affordable good food in a relaxing atmosphere, if the reviews are anything to go by.

Where ever you live in the Netherlands, there is sure to be a Michelin star restaurant near you... as long as they don't keep giving them back of course!

Two Dutch Signs

2011-02-23T22:00:00.000-08:00

On my travels around my local areas I regularly see two signs with sayings on them which are worth sharing because they amuse me. They actually only really work in Dutch so this is really a post for the Dutch speakers out there.

Photo: An "Eikel"

Wij houden van je hond maar niet van z'n stront - a polite way of saying please don't let your dog foul here. Believe me its a huge problem here but nice to see someone trying to tackle it in a civilised way.

And my favourite is this as text on a licence plate:

Je hoeft niet in een boom te hangen om een eikel te zijn - for non-Dutch speakers it's a play on words. Eikel means acorn in Dutch, but it also means idiot (put nicely) so it means you don't have to hang in a tree to be an 'eikel'. Trust me, it works in Dutch....

"Well I Never Knew That": Rafael van der Vaart - From Humble Beginnings

2011-02-20T22:25:00.000-08:00

In September last year, Dutch footballer Rafael van der Vaart made a move to Premiership football in England from Real Madrid after losing a regular place in the Spanish side. The move to Tottenham Hotspur was met with excitement from the English press.

A few weeks ago I watched an interview with the Dutchman on Football Focus on a Saturday on the BBC. He talked about his youth growing up living in a caravan in Heemskerk. And that is where he learned to play football, using empty beer bottles as goal posts. He says now that he realises that his lifestyle growing up was different but he covets it all the same. He was talent spotted at the age of 10 and subsequently joined the Ajax Academy. The rest, as they say is history.

This interesting fact about this international football star had passed me by. Now a quick look on the internet and the English press was full of it at the time of his transfer.

What is also interesting is the fact that his mother is Spanish. She moved to Holland when she was 6 so by rights he could have also chosen to play for the Spanish national team. Luckily for Holland he chose to play for his birth country.

He is reminded of his humble beginning every time he heads 'home' as he passes the caravan where the van der Vaart family used to live on the way to his parents' house - the one he bought for them when he made a name for himself in the footballing world.

Having cost Spurs £8,000,000 and played in a World Cup Final last year, he certainly has come a long way from the life he started in a caravan north of the Dutch capital city. No wonder his mantra is 'believe'.

Book Review: Nederlands English by Alison O'Dornan

2011-02-16T21:37:00.000-08:00

A Book for Teaching Bilingual
Children the Alphabet

When I was teaching my eldest son the alphabet I faced a problem that only parents of bilingual children face - the fact that the traditional objects used for each letter don't match in both English and Dutch. What I mean is this:

A is for apple (EN) and appel (NL)
B is for ball (EN) and bal (NL)
C is for cat (EN) and oh.... kat (NL).....

For each letter I drew the object and until I hit C, it was working a charm. At such a young age trying to explain that cat in English is spelt differently to kat in Dutch is difficult to say the least, if not impossible. In fact, there aren't a huge array of typical Dutch words to use for teaching toddlers the alphabet. Finding something that worked in English and Dutch was hard. And I had only reached C.......

"Learning the alphabet in a second language is much easier when the words start with the same letter in both languages" reads the back of Alison O'Dornan's book "Nederlands English". Which, I think, was my thought process a few years ago when I started with my son. This book would have made that process a lot easier.

I'll let Alison explain how this book came in to being,

"The initial idea was inspired by a young Dutch mother living in the UK, who found it confusing to read either Dutch or English alphabet books with her one year old daughter. At the age of one, children do not distinguish between the two languages but simply learn that an object has two different sounds associated with it. Hence as they start to learn to recognise letters by associating their shape with a sound, it is important that the item depicted matches the sound of the letter. So if a child is shown an English alphabet book where “K” is often represented by a picture of a ‘Kite’, then this would be very confusing as it should be “V” for ‘Vlieger’ in Dutch, a very different sound. By carefully picking the objects that we have used for our ABC book we have eliminated this confusion."

The book itself is nicely laid out with the English word and a sentence at the top of the page, a picture of the object in the middle and the Dutch word and text at the bottom of the page. It's the first book in what will be a series with other languages.

It's a great concept and as far as I know it is quite unique. If you're teaching your children a second language from an early age this is a great resource to have. The book is currently being revised and teh new version will be available in the spring - it's worth waiting for the updated edition for an improved read with your children.

For more information and a peek inside the Dutch/English book visit www.Diglotbooks.com

A Little Help in the Delivery Room for Expats: Doulas

2011-02-15T01:04:00.000-08:00

Having a baby in a foreign country can be quite daunting and if your mum and your best friend live back in your country of origin then having your nearest and dearest around you at such an emotional time can be very hard to plan. However, hiring a doula can help - for many many reasons. A doula is someone who provides support (non-medical) during pregnancy, labour and the birth. For the birth of my second baby, I had a doula on hand and I would recommend it to anyone!!

If you want to know more, read an article I wrote for I Am Expat about my experience with a doula.

The Louwman Museum - The Dutch National Car Museum

2011-02-13T22:19:00.000-08:00

The Louwman Museum in The Hague (c) L van Mulligen

Situated in The Hague in a purpose built building, the Louwman museum showcases what was the oldest private collection of cars in the world. The museum opened last year and we kept driving past it from the time it turned in to a building site through to the erection of an impressive looking building. However, until January we hadn't ventured in. My son's 4th birthday presented the perfect opportunity to change that.

The collection was started in 1932 with the acquisition of a twenty year old Dodge. It's now very much older and just one of the 200 plus pieces to marvel at inside the museum. What is quite amazing about the exhibition here is the sheer variety of vehicles that has been collected over the years, from horse drawn fire engines to a Cadillac owned by Elvis Presley and from a tandem from 1897 to a Toyota Prius Hybrid made in 1998. It's a stunning collection of vehicles - and that out of the mouth of a non-car fanatic.

It's not just the cars that are a sight to behold, the building is also impressive. Michael Graves, an American architect, designed the building to mix with the beautiful surroundings and there is a sense of Dutch traditionalism and modernism at the same time.

The high ceilings and ample space for the exhibitions give a luxurious feeling as you wander around and lighting is used optimally to reflect the era of the cars of show. The lay out of the exhibitions, and the design of the corridors, ensure that each new section of the museum stays a surprise until the last possible moment.

To top it off, the last section of the museum, which incorporates a restaurant and bar, will surely raise a smile.

To find out more visit the Louwman museum website which as far as I can work out is only in Dutch - but never fear because all information about the cars in the museum itself is in Dutch and English.

First Day at School Traditions

2011-02-09T21:53:00.000-08:00

My four year old has just started to make his own way in the world - well, he's just started at primary school in any case.

It's not only his initiation into the Dutch education system, but mine too. The first difference between the Dutch and the British education systems is the fact that he is already starting. In the UK, he would still be in pre-school until the school year he turned five. Children in the Netherlands can start at primary school when they are four if they (or rather their parents) wish but it is not compulsory until five.

However, as my son has been in a peuterspeelzaal (preschool or nursery) since October 2009, this is a natural step for him to move with his friends to a new school.

Photo: Tim & Annette

What was strange to me as I waved my son off in his new classroom was the absence of school uniforms. In Britain it is common to wear a school uniform. Dutch children wear their own choice of clothes. So there's no photo of my son on his first day at school in his crisp, clean uniform (which looks like it's been dragged daily through a hedge by the end of the first term). Instead there is a photo of him wearing the clothes he wears every day and a rucksack on his back. Not quite the same picture for this British mum.

An American friend told me that she missed putting her daughter on the big, yellow school bus when she started school. This picture is as traditional and memorable in the US as putting a school uniform on for the first time in the UK. Both pictures very much linked to the first day at school.

Of course, it is not about whether school uniforms are right (there are lots of positives to not having a school uniform: costs and stressing to get it all washed on time spring to mind) or whether children should be bussed to school (in fact in the Netherlands, most parents can walk or cycle their kids to school so buses are redundant) - it's about the feeling of missing out on a classic, traditional memory which we associate with that first day in school.

What first day of school traditions or memories are associated with your home country?

Ten Things You Don't Know about The Netherlands and the Dutch Until You Move Here (Part 5)

2011-02-06T21:51:00.000-08:00

The Dutch take to the Ice (c) A van Mulligen

10. The Dutch are Ice Crazy
Maybe I led a sheltered life in England but I had never stood on a frozen lake or seen people skating on natural ice until I came to the Netherlands. If we have a cold spell here, the shops are amok with Dutch folk trying to buy new skates. As soon as there is ice covering any waterway the Dutch make a mad dash for their skates and take to the ice like ducks to water. And they have a blast. I have never seen anything like it - the Elfstedentocht is a great example of the enthusiasm and excitement for skating in this little land.

Of course there is a dangerous side - lives are lost because of thin ice. At best, falling through the ice is certainly no fun and not something you forget in a hurry. My husband can attest to that!

Ten Things You Don't Know about The Netherlands and the Dutch Until You Move Here (Part 4)

2011-02-02T22:03:00.000-08:00

Photo: Cienpies Design

In the Netherlands, it already starts off a bit strange. If you want, you may send your four year old to school. But you don't have to. When your child turns five, they absolutely, positively must go to school. So, as a parent, you're already faced with a question at the age of four.

But wait, it gets complicated I promise. Before junior has even left primary school, he or she is tested (Cito toets) and, based on the results and a talk between parents and teacher, is then streamed into different levels of education. Yes, at the age of eleven already. It is selective and ability based - much different to most European systems.

And then the Dutch education system throws acronyms at parents and doesn't stop until the kids go out and work (and then there are a whole set of new ones):

VMBO (Voorbereidend Middelbaar Beroepsonderwijs)
HAVO (Hoger Algemeen Voortgezet Onderwijs)
VWO (Voorbereidend wetenschappelijk onderwijs)

I have been practicing for years to remember what VMBO, HAVO and VWO stand for (and actually mean) but with no success. Luckily I have another seven years to get to grips with it.

8. Dutch Customer Service Hasn't Been Invented
I've said it before and I'll say it again.... many companies here may as well just shut down their customer service departments as they antagonise more than they help. Oh, I'm sure there are exceptions but in ten years not one company comes straight to mind for their outstanding contribution to Dutch customer service.

Photo: Len-k-a

The Undutchables book explains this as a historical, culture issue - everyone working in customer service roles don't see themselves as a representative of the company they work for (hence the common sentence uttered from CSRs "It's not my fault - it's the company") but as an individual equal to the customer. Everything is taken quite personally. Or they just don't care - whether or not you get a solution or are happy as you leave the store, the person serving you gets paid at the end of the week or month.

And Dutch people tend to accept customer service for what it is - and that's it.

I'll give you an example: I have a mobile phone. It's a pre-paid account with Telfort which I've had for close to ten years here. Recently money started evaporating from my phone. It literally disappeared over night continuously over the space of a month. So obviously I contacted Telfort. The end result was that Telfort could not help me. Or should that be, Telfort would not help me. They indicated they could not see where that money has gone (50 euro in total) and that the solution was to change my number... yes, the number I have had for nearly ten years and use for The Writing Well. Needless to say I am following up (through OPTA) and changing provider, taking my number with me.

I have plenty more examples but I won't bore you with them - if you live here, you have your own stories...... Who knew it was so bad?

Ten Things You Don't Know about The Netherlands and the Dutch Until You Move Here (Part 3)

2011-01-30T21:35:00.000-08:00

6. UFOs are Everywhere
That's 'unidentified fried objects' if you're wondering. To be honest, before I moved here I couldn't have offered any suggestions at all about what Dutch people eat (apart from cheese). Now I live here, it's an easy question to answer - anything weirdly shaped and fried! In Holland, most of these UFOs are known as snacks:

Kipcorn (chicken like sausage covered in breadcrumbs and fried)
Frikandel (indescribable contents shaped like a long sausage and fried)
Bitterballen (often seen on the menu in bars - small balls of fried things)
Picanto (thick sausage snack which is... you guessed it.. fried)
Patat (otherwise known as fries or chips and in any case certainly fried)

Traditional food at New Year, oliebollen which are in essence dough balls, are also fried.

In short, they've all seen the inside of a deep fat fryer. When you're in the Netherlands, go native and give snacks a try. Just don't ask too much about what is in them.

Ten Things You Don't Know about The Netherlands and the Dutch Until You Move Here (Part 2)

2011-01-26T21:05:00.000-08:00

Photo: (c) Amanda van Mulligen

The typical Dutch stereotype consists of cheese eating, clog wearing tall people talking a dialect of German with a backdrop of windmills sailing round on the flatlands. However, there is much more to this small country and the people who live in it than the rest of the world thinks. Here's the second part of a series on things you don't necessarily know about the Dutch and their country until you move here.

3. The Dutch Don't Mince Their Words
The idea of a bumbling Brit trying to politely make his point heard is an alien concept to the Dutch who say what they mean and think nothing of it. It is not rudeness, it's simply honesty. A good example given by many expats is the Dutch reluctance to wrap up the message of "That dress doesn't suit you" or "That haircut is a disaster" whereas an American or Brit would tackle it a little more tactfully - if they'd do anything more than nod appreciatively and then bitch about it when they get home. At least you get to hear the truth.....

4. The Dutch Language is Actually Distinctive
I remember being on holiday in Turkey as a teenager, standing in line for one attraction or another in front of a group of foreign speaking tourists. It sounded, simply put, like a strange German dialect. Now I live here, I realise it really is a very different language to that of our neighbours in the east. I could certainly pick it out of a line up now.

Dutch is also a Germanic language (West Germanic to be precise) and whilst it has similarities to German, it also has word origins in common with English. Many Dutch have no issues speaking the German language but the same is not true the other way around.

Dutch is much less harsh when spoken, and I think a little more poetic than German. And besides, if I repeated my thoughts from my teenage years I may find myself homeless.......

Ten Things You Don't Know about The Netherlands and the Dutch Until You Move Here (Part 1)

2011-01-23T22:00:00.000-08:00

Photo: Suresh

Photo: John Nyberg

It's drunk for every occasion and is usually accompanied by a sweet treat if you are visiting.

2. Part-Timers Rule
Despite the government trying every way they can think off (aside from compulsory work laws) to incentivise women to work full-time, it has failed miserably. The Dutch have the most part-time workers in the whole of the EU. To quote the European Commissions statistics group (Eurostat),

"All regions in the Netherlands record a remarkably low average (ed: of working hours) compared with other regions. The highest value in the Netherlands was found in Flevoland with an average of 31.6 hours per week, which is still 2.4 hours less than in Martinique (France), the region with the lowest value of all regions in the EU, not counting the Netherlands. This supports the conclusion that the Netherlands is a special case regarding the average time spent at work."

And the best thing is that Dutch women are extremely happy with their working lives and the home-work balance. They simply have better things to do. Read the article on Slate for more explanation.

The Modern Day Dutch & British High Street

2011-01-19T22:13:00.000-08:00

At the end of last year I watched a series on the BBC called "Turn Back Time; The High Street". It was a weekly series which placed modern day shopkeepers and tradespeople on business on a high street and then turned back the clock. The viewer was taken back in time to 1870 when the High Street came into being, through the Edwardian and Victorian eras, to the 1930s, to rationing during World War 2 through to the 1960s and 1970s. It was fascinating.

Photo: Jelmer Rozendal

Each shop owner was only allowed to stock what was actually available in the time period, and sell their wares in the manner of the era. From small, family, specialist businesses the high street turned into a dead, empty shells as large self-service supermarkets took over. The High Street changed in response to customer demands and trends; cheap, disposable goods. And nobody seemed too thrilled with the way it developed - yet that is the reality of our high streets in Britain - chain stores and large supermarkets.

It's not hugely different in the Netherlands. I read that up to 90% of high street stores belong to a chain and that certainly fits with how I see each new town I visit - the standard shops strewn across every town centre. International branded shops are emerging on a regular basis (like Starbucks and the Apple Store). One difference in the Netherlands though is the absence of superstores and huge out of town retail parks.

Photo: Petra Giner

I also think local shopping still plays a big role here. Within walking distance of where I live there are two bakers, three supermarkets, two newsagents/bookstores, a post office, two delicatessens, two takeaway shops and two chemists. None of the shops are very big, including the supermarkets. In fact they are barely the size of a Tesco Extra store but for many locals these supermarkets are where they do their main shopping and visit them daily.

The specialist shops nearby do tend to be independent, family businesses so whilst the average high street is dominated by chains, the local arena does seem to be open to smaller fish.

Is your local shopping area dominated by chains or is there still room for independent shopkeepers where you live? What do you think about the way High Streets have developed?

The Hell of 1963 - An Elfstedentocht To Remember

2011-01-17T07:00:00.000-08:00

Photo: (c) Amanda van Mulligen

The Elfstedentocht (Eleven Cities Tour) of '63 took place exactly 48 years ago today. The Elfstedentocht is a 200km skating marathon that takes place on frozen over canals, rivers and lakes in Friesland, in the north of the Netherlands - the country's biggest natural ice marathon and the world's longest.

1963 saw a particularly harsh competition, hence the label of "De Hel van '63". Temperatures dropped to -18 degrees centigrade. Only 126 of the 9,000 skaters who started the race crossed the finish line. Thousands of skaters suffered from frost bite, frozen eyes, broken bones and other similar horrible injuries

Dutch director, Steven de Jong, directed a historical drama based on the twelfth Elfstedentocht - 'De Hel van '63' was released in 2009 and it had very mixed reviews. However, I really enjoyed it and it's a great way to spend 108 minutes to get a good idea about the Dutch culture around skating, the importance of the Elfstedentocht, how the Elfstedentocht works in practice and how severe the 1963 drama actually was.

In a nutshell, the skaters pass through eleven Frisian cities, starting and ending in the Frisian capital of Leeuwarden. In each city participants collect a stamp (as well as in two secret locations along the route to stop cheating) but they must pass though all checkpoints by midnight to qualify as a finisher. The winner of 1963 was Reinier Paping - in conditions so severe he became somewhat of a national hero.

The last Elfstedentocht took place in 1997, but every winter the rumblings and hopes of the event taking place 'this year' surface. In fact, at the end of last year, there was a flare of (unfounded) optimism when weatherman, Harry Otten ( Wereldomroep) said if everyone went out to clear the snow from the ice there could be an Elfstedentocht 'next week'. In reality, the ice was not thick enough (it needs to be 15 cm thick across the entire course).

I am looking forward to the year it can be held - what an event that will be!

Expat Book Review: Postcards from Across the Pond by Michael Harling

2011-01-12T22:03:00.000-08:00

Michael Harling is an American who accidentally ended up living in the UK. He met his future wife in Ireland and moved to Sussex to be exact. And having been raised in a rural area of corn fields and cow farms, a twenty minute drive from the nearest shop, Sussex must have seemed a little crowded to this new immigrant in town. In any case, the move from the US to the US certainly gave Harling enough fodder for an amusing book about life in Britain through the eyes of a foreigner.

This book is not only a funny read, but highlights something interesting: For an American, a move to the UK would seem an easy one to make - the language is (almost) the same, the culture is not worlds apart. However, Harling soon discovered that the differences lay in the small things in daily life. He found that everything "is just off-center enough to give you a sense of permanent imbalance." This struck a big, clanging chord with me.

I wrote an article for The Telegraph last year about the differences between life in the Netherlands and life in my native Britain. A reader commented that adjusting to life in in the Netherlands was in fact a piece of cake and the two countries really are very alike. But they are not - and I think Harling hits the nail on the head with his observations of life in Britain: When you move to a far off land you expect life to be very different, when you to a country nearby or one with much in common you don't expect your life to be rocked. But it is - just by leaving your home country.

The differences lie in the little things like posting a letter, getting a parcel delivered, getting a social security number, driving, shopping, sports, weather, TV, queuing, bureaucracy.... Need I go on?

Luckily, this book is not a mammoth whinge about everything in the UK being inferior to its US cousin. Au contraire, Harling doesn't see all the adaptations he needs to make as a step in the wrong direction. In fact, he gives the impression that he actually quite likes a lot of the differences - once he got used to them.

In this book, which is actually a collection of blog postings he has made over the years, he shares his astonishment at the lack of St. Patrick's Day celebrations in England; his difficulty buying shoe laces; his confusion playing the game of rounders (which he likens to baseball until he sees the bat. "The bat resembles a giant rolling pin with only one handle," he explains); the haphazardness of the local bus schedules; and trying to recreate Thanksgiving away from the US ("Last Thursday was Thanksgiving, and 60 million people on this island didn't give a shit," he tells us).

This book is 172 pages to make you titter (a word us Brits can use without sniggering) and it's a great read for all expats everywhere, for Brits who can laugh at themselves, and Americans who want to know how different life is on the other side of the Atlantic.

His blog of the same title (where he describes himself as an "American author living in the south of England, sort of like Bill Bryson but without the best selling books and gobs of money") is http://postcardsfromacrossthepond.blogspot.com/

Could There Be A Firework Ban in the Pipeline?

2011-01-11T22:28:00.000-08:00

Finally! Some sense! At their next meeting, Dutch Mayors will be discussing banning firework use by individuals after spending yet more of tax payer's money to repair the damage after another New Year's Eve in the Netherlands. I won't bother ranting about it all again, but suffice to say I am pleased that there are those in the local councils across the country that recognise this 'blowing up and vandalising at new year' culture isn't normal and shouldn't be accepted as a way of closing out the year.

This move comes after the mayor of Schiedam spoke out and said enough is enough. 85,000 euro is what the damage there alone is costing.

I love the fireworks at midnight here but the fireworks all day long makes no sense...... but I guess there is no happy medium so it will be interesting to see what they come up with.......

Guest Post For Clogs and Tulips

2011-01-10T22:41:00.000-08:00

Photo: (c) Amanda van Mulligen

If you have any interest in what it's like to have a baby in the Netherlands, then I've just written a guest post for Tiffany's blog, Clogs and Tulips.

"If you trawl expat forums, you are likely to come across some heavy criticism of the Dutch maternity system. And yes, I agree, having a baby in the Netherlands may not be the same as having a baby back in your home country but there are worse things you can do. Here’s what I’ve learnt through two pregnancies and births in the Netherlands."

Read the full post here.

Keeping It Local to Rebuild Shattered Lives

2011-01-09T22:00:00.000-08:00

As you may know by now, I love to shout about expats who are doing great things in their host country. If you have missed it, check out my latest article to be published. Ode has run it and the thing I love most about Ode is that they only share positive news. It's an article about British expat Figen Cakir who is using her art and design skills to do her bit to help her community in the Turkish city of Golcuk. Nice news to start 2011 off with.

Interview With Me On Orangesplaash

2011-01-03T23:00:00.000-08:00

Orangesplaash, an expat blog with tales of travel adventures, cross-cultural dilemmas and expat tips has published an interview with me. It was great fun and made me realise what fun my journey has been in the Netherlands.

"Amanda van Mulligen is our expat guest for this week, sharing tips and tales from her expat life in the Netherlands spanning more than 10 years. A fellow expat blogger, Amanda writes passionately about all things expat related, along with managing her own company The Writing Well, that provides English language writing services. I personally enjoy her writing style and insights into expat life in the Netherlands."

If you want to read the full interview visit Orangesplaash. Thanks Arwa for asking me to participate.

A New Year's Dip

2011-01-03T01:16:00.000-08:00

Aside from blowing things up and spending over 60million euro on fireworks, the Dutch traditionally take to the water at New Year by means of a nieuwjaarsduik. At different events across the country brave souls don their swim gear and charge into a body of freezing water. I went to watch them in Zoetermeer at the Noord Aa.

To say it was all as mad as I had expected is an understatement. Two hundred people stood together on the Noord Aa beach wearing woolly red Unox hats with towels and dressing gowns covering their swimming shorts, bikinis, T-shirts and swimsuits. They all waited in good spirits for a local councillor to give them the go ahead at 13.00 to start their run into the water.

Photo (c) Amanda van Mulligen

As preparation there was a few minutes warm up before everyone shed their dressing gown and towels....

Photo (c) Amanda van Mulligen

and then they were off....

Photo (c) Amanda van Mulligen

Two hundred Zoetermeerders pelted it down the beach into the water. There were a few minutes of screaming, laughing and splashing before the last dipper was back on shore, dabbing themselves down with towels, blankets and warming their tummies with a hot cup of Unox soup.

Now.. er.. happy new year!! You can see more of the Noord Aa event in the video below.

Deaths, Injuries, Vandalism - Just A Peaceful New Year's Eve in Holland

2011-01-02T11:19:00.000-08:00

Photo: L van Mulligen

Growing up in England, New Year's Eve was about seeing the new year in with friends and family. We would spend the evening in a pub somewhere talking and drinking and maybe dancing. In England, you can even post a letter on New Year's Eve and New Year's Day if you want. Here in the Netherlands, pre-empting the destruction, TNT blocks up all the postboxes across the two days so no fireworks can be put in the postboxes. In some high risk areas, they remove the postboxes altogether. Parking meters are covered up, letterboxes for apartment blocks are covered over in plywood and public transport shuts down before the night even gets going. But that isn't enough to stop some.

Despite ten years here, the activities on Dutch streets on New Year's Eve never cease to amaze me. Children as young as five and six carry around rucksacks full of fireworks, letting them off as they walk around their neighbourhood. Grown men demonstrate to their toddlers how fireworks can blow up a snow mound or a drain. Children still in junior school set fires in the streets, burning anything they can find around them on the paths and when that runs out going door to door to ask for paper. In some areas, residents feel trapped in their houses as fireworks are thrown at their houses and cars. 40 cars were set fire to in The Hague, just like last year. Bus shelters, shop windows, post boxes and bins are blown up as a matter of course. Fires burn in streets - anything from Christmas trees to mattresses thrown on as fuel. The fire services were busy across the country - they put out 200 fires in undergrounds bins in Amsterdam alone.

And that is to say nothing of the human cost of New Year's Eve in the Netherlands. This year two families lost a child to the culture around fireworks on New Year's Eve in the Netherlands, both as a result of homemade fireworks. Others spent New Year's Day in the hospital with loved ones. Police officers were injured in some of the big cities and in other areas the police seemed to keep a low profile to avoid confrontation, meaning gangs of youths ruled the streets for the night. Other emergency service workers risked being attacked whilst trying to do their jobs.

642 people were arrested in total across the country on New Year's Eve for attacking others (including public service workers such as firemen, ambulance personnel and police), vandalism and other offences.

The thing that really amazes me every year is the media quoting high ranking police officers and mayors saying "New Year's Eve was relatively peaceful". Try telling that to the car owners who have nothing but a burnt out wreck left over, or the family of the police officer with a serious head injury caused by yobs with fireworks, or the families in Ypenburg who are busy replacing their windows after yobs went on the rampage there.

For some reason, New Year's Eve is about disorder and destruction to many in big cities across the Netherlands. It is an opportunity to attack, destroy and be violent and each year it gets no better, despite steps taken by the police. And to call New Year's Eve 'relatively peaceful' seems to me to be accepting the violence and destruction as the norm. Violence and damage aside, I can't even get my head around children spending New Year's Eve letting off fireworks.

Naturally, the majority of the population see the New Year in in a sensible and gezellig manner - with champagne, oliebollen and appelflappen shared with family and friends. And unfortunately, it is usually these people that spend New Year's Day cleaning up the streets they live in and sweeping up the damage caused by others. What a way to start the year.......

Happy New Year

2010-12-31T13:00:00.000-08:00

I would like to wish you all a great New Year's Eve and hope you are celebrating with loved ones, no matter where you may be. Here in the Netherlands today is marked by a stupendous amount of fireworks (from morning to the early hours of New Year's Day) and the stuffing of faces with oliebollen (oil balls literally translated - and literally tasting too).

How is the New Year marked where you are?

Where ever you are, however you are celebrating -

all the best for a great new year!

Photo: Madhavan

Well, That Was 2010

2010-12-30T22:07:00.000-08:00

Photo: Billy Alexander

It's end of the year and so time for a little reflection. I purposefully don't do too much reflection on the year that has just gone as there's not a lot I can do to change anything that hasn't gone quite as I had liked but a little look over the year does help to create a little focus for the next year.

Without a doubt the highlight of 2010 for me on a personal level was the birth of my second son, and the time since his birth has been ~~busy~~ ~~manic~~ chaos and I've not had the time to do as much writing as I would have liked - but I'm not going to beat myself up about it because I know what it more important right now!!

Away from me, this year has seen some big events in the Netherlands. Here's an overview of some of the things to have hit the Dutch headlines this year - in no particular order. There's lots more of course and NOS and RNW have good summaries.

Politics: Extreme right MP Geert Wilders somehow ended up with a major say in political matters in this country. It took almost all of this year to get a minority government formed after the last one collapsed due to disagreement about the future Dutch presence in Afghanistan. After talking to just about anyone who had ever uttered anything political, Mark Rutte managed to scrape a government together. He then went on to be named politician of the year - was this for his perseverance? Determination? Strength in the face of adversity?

Crime: The most notorious criminal of the year (and not for the first time I suspect) has to be Joran van der Sloot. Currently awaiting trial for the murder of a Peruvian woman, Stephany Flores Ramirez, van der Sloot was arrested in May this year. He hit the headlines with his suspected involvement in the disappearance of Natalee Holloway.

Sport: The sports highlight of 2010 can be no other than the Dutch team reaching the World Cup final in South Africa. An amazing achievement, despite the loss and the after party also hit headlines across the world.

Showbiz: Footballer Wesley Sneijder and Yolanthe Cabau van Kasbergen are a bit like David Beckham and Posh Spice but then a little less well-known and Yolanthe never belonged to a girl's band (she's an actress/presenter). They did, however, get hitched in Italy in the summer - barely giving Wesley time to recover from the world cup hangover. There was romance, glamour and a dispute over unpaid bills - showbiz in true style. It was all over the press - whether you wanted to know about it or not.

Volcanoes: The best volcanic action this year was definitely the Icelandic one which no one can pronounce. It stopped air traffic everywhere. In fact, mother nature has done her best this year to ground planes across the world. She even tried to ruin my Sinterklaas celebrations.

What's the highlight of your year been? What has stuck most with you from events in the Netherlands or your home country in 2010?

Keeping the Bike Wheels Turning

2010-12-26T21:38:00.000-08:00

Photo: A van Mulligen

An article on Nu.nl last week reported that many cyclists are complaining that cycle paths are icy and slippy. My initial thought was "Well d'oh! That white stuff keeps falling from the sky, it keeps freezing - and besides the paths are no party either, and even local roads are a mess."

And then the penny dropped - this is what makes the Netherlands that bit different from many other European countries, particularly my country of origin, Britain. Cycle paths here are a way of life, much more than they are in the UK and cycling in the Netherlands is an accepted means of transportation. Getting on your bike is not just a fun Sunday afternoon out, it's a way of life, it's a way of getting from A to B. So snow and ice on the cycle paths is cause for a moan - in the same way the Brits would moan if most of the roads were not cleared for driving safely on.

I read a blog post about cycling in the snow and ice - and at the end of it there was an interesting comment from a Brit living in Sweden. There, many cycle paths are cleared before roads. Culture plays such an important role in how we get about when winter hits.

I witnessed a young man cycling yesterday on my way to the shops and I wasn't sure if I should admire his determination or have him committed. He hared across the icy path in front of me on his two wheels, pedalled across the slushy road and careered onto the snow covered cycle path. And he came to a wobbly grinding halt. Undeterred, he picked up his bike in a graceful motion, placed it on the road and tore off again. Even those in cars were edging their way cautiously along the road but this young cyclist obviously had no desire to be held back by a bit of ice and ten centimetres of snow. However, other cyclists are a little more cautious - hence the complaints pouring in to the Fietsersbond.

The Fietsersbond (Cycling Association) is calling for all main cycle routes to be cleared (not just gritted but swept of snow too). However, we are already hearing mutterings that the salt supply is running low across the country.... and we have much more winter to come.

Are you braving the snow on your bike or have you tucked your bike away until the snow clears?

Merry Christmas

2010-12-23T23:00:00.000-08:00

Photo: Kurhan

A very quick post before Santa arrives to wish you all a fun filled festive few days.

Merry Christmas!!!

And for anyone out there who hasn't quite finished their Christmas shopping... give a gift with a conscience!!

A December Winterland

2010-12-20T22:00:00.000-08:00

Photo: (C) L van Mulligen

The Netherlands (and much of Europe) has turned into a white winterland in the last few days. Last Thursday it started snowing and a major downfall over the weekend topped it off. For those with no place to go, it has been a few days of sledging, snow boarding and even langlaufen on the unusually quiet roads.

Photo: (C) A van Mulligen

For those with some place to go, it has been chaos. A quick trip to the supermarket on Saturday for my husband turned in to a scene from a strange movie - he waited with a cyclist for an ambulance to turn up after she slipped on her bike and cut her head open and he witnessed the fire brigade pulling a car from its side in the shopping centre car park after the driver had skidded, hit the kerb and turned the car. It's mad out there!

Photo: (C) A van Mulligen

For those heading abroad for Christmas the recent weather has certainly scuppered travel plans (see Chelsea Girl in China's tale of her quest to get home). I just hope that any of you heading somewhere to spend Christmas with your families make it there in the end. There is a thaw scheduled this week - so the weathermen say.........

Killing Two Birds with One Stone - Zebra Crossings and Police Targets

2010-12-19T22:05:00.000-08:00

Photo: Christian Kitazume

There has been a bit of attention in the press recently for the scrapping by the Minister of Security, Mr Opstelten, of ticket quotas for police officers.

The management team of Utrecht's boys in blue has instead issued a "guideline"of around 160 tickets per year and this will also take account of those police who are not consistently out patrolling the streets. Police performance assessments will still include this element.

Some of the police on Utrecht's force say it is pestering the public. I say "get your butts out to the nearest zebra crossing and meet your quota in a week." Seriously - public safety and a good performance assessment - win win right?

There was a recent article in the Dutch press that stated that more and more drivers are not stopping at zebra crossings. Worse still, many drivers don't actually realise they are required by law to stop and allow pedestrians to cross (the law states those persons clearly about to cross the road). This isn't the first post (or second or third) where I've touched upon this topic - and it won't be the last - but it is a pet peeve.

There is a zebra crossing on the road I cross to get to my son's school. I have stood there in a group of mothers, prams and toddlers whilst cars race on through and we have been collectively amazed that our invisible cloaks really do work!!!!! Mutterings in the group standing with me of "I'd like to throw a brick at cars that don't stop" tell me I am not the only one this bugs....

So anyway - two birds, one stone.

Christmas Tree Top - Dutch Style

2010-12-15T22:00:00.000-08:00

Photo: Ugur Vidinligil

In the run up to Christmas in my first year in the Netherlands, my husband and I set out to buy decorations for the Christmas tree we would buy. I We decided on a colour and collected the necessary shiny Christmas balls, snowmen, reindeer and tinselly decorations together.

I then went on the search for a fairy for the top of the tree. Not a single winged-like woman to be seen. Instead some rather odd looking pointy thing that may well have doubled up as a lethal weapon.

"What's that?" I asked my evidently bored husband.
"It's a top," he replied.
"What?"
"A top," he clarified.
"Ok. Top of what?"I asked.
"Top for the Christmas tree," he said as if talking to a toddler.
"Right. That isn't like the 'top' of any Christmas tree I've ever seen. Where are the fairies?" I asked.
Blank look back. So off I went to resume my search of winged decorations. After a fruitless few minutes I returned to my husband.
"I can't find any fairies." I announced.
"Nope," he said.
So I picked up a silver 'top' for my future Christmas tree and mumbled all the way to the checkout about the insanity of a stupid, long pointy thing sitting on my Christmas tree, serving no decorative value whatsoever. But a Christmas tree with nothing on top is like a ballerina sans tutu. It just doesn't cut it.

So since that fateful day in 2000, this silver top (called a kerstpiek I believe) has intermittently sat on top of our Christmas tree. I say intermittently because the stupidness of the long pointy design has been proven time and time again: the top of a Christmas tree is often long and thin and it CANNOT HOLD THE WEIGHT OF THE BLOODY 'TOP'! So we either have a precariously hanging piek (and I am sure the inevitable will happen one year and someone will lose an eye) or a piek that lasts five minutes before I yank it off and put it back in the attic because it looks ridiculous.

But not this year! Finally, I have remembered the loathsome kerstpiek in good time, reminded by the Christmas decorations in Intratuin last week - so I sent an SOS text to my dad. And he has bought me a Christmas fairy. Finally, my tenth Christmas tree here in Holland will have the topping any good Christmas tree deserves.

Passing on Festive Traditions

2010-12-12T22:00:00.000-08:00

On Sunday morning my son woke and decided to treat us to a medley of various Sinterklaas songs; this despite the fact that Pakjesavond and the celebration of Sinterklaas passed a week ago. Obviously spurred on by the theme he hurried downstairs, took one of his shoes from the hall cupboard and placed it in the living room, in the same magical place that had proved profitable just a week or so before. He placed a carrot in his shoe and put some milk in a Tupperware bowl for Sint’s horse. And all this by 9am.

Explaining to my nearly three year old son why putting his shoe out last weekend was redundant was easy.
“Sinterklaas has gone back to Spain, with his horse and all his Zwarte Pieten,” I explained. “He’ll be back next year.”
“The shoe is for the Kerstman,” replies my smart son.
“Oh ok, well Father Christmas doesn’t put presents in shoes. He only comes to the house on Christmas Eve and that is a lot of sleeps away,” I told him.

He looked stumped. And of course why shouldn’t he. Looking deploringly at my husband, I tried to scramble an answer together that explained that Sinterklaas and Father Christmas are different beings (when in fact they are not), that they have different modes of transport (one has a horse and the other reindeer and a sleigh), they come at different times of the year (5 December and 25th December), put presents in different receptacles (one preferring a shoe over the stocking) and they have different types of helpers (Sinterklaas opting for Zwarte Pieten and Father Christmas making use of busy little elves to make toys). I did not even attempt to go into their living arrangements: why one chooses the warmer climate of Spain and the other lives in the rather cold, snowy Lapland. That is a conversation for much later, if he ever asks.

Of course, the one thing he got loud and clear was that Father Christmas also brings presents to good boys and girls across the world. So he placed the carrot back in the vegetable rack, his shoe back in the cupboard and handed me the tub of milk. Then he pointed to his stocking, and I reiterated that on Christmas Eve he could hang it on his bed and Father Christmas would fill it with presents, as long as he is a good boy…….

And that closed the conversation out for now. The discussion we would eventually have with our children about the Dutch Sinterklaas and the British version, that of Father Christmas, was a topic of conversation between me and my husband some time ago, long before our son was even born. To reconcile the two events seemed quite difficult when we talked about it, but it is something that needs to be done in a multi-cultural household.

The Dutch ‘do’ Christmas much more than they used to. The main celebration used to be Sinterklaas on the 5th December but Christmas has become more commercial here and now it is also a time of giving gifts. However, my husband’s childhood memories, and the traditions around Christmas are very different to mine. In England we do not celebrate Sinterklaas. Until ten years ago, I had never heard of it and knew nothing about it. It was all about Christmas for us.

So our first Christmas together was a unique and new experience for my Dutch partner: Christmas stockings, Christmas pudding, brandy butter, presents under the Christmas tree, mince pies, turkey with stuffing and cranberry sauce and pulling Christmas crackers before tucking into lunch. This was all new to him, but for me, all traditional.

So now, every year, he directs the Sinterklaas celebration and I organise Christmas. This way we pass on our own holiday traditions to each other, and our children, and share the uniqueness of our culture with each other. Our son of course benefits as he gets two rounds of presents……. the luck of a child with a mother from England and a father from the Netherlands.

This was first published a year ago in my Expats@Home newsletter. If you want to receive future editions of my newsletter sign up at http://www.thewritingwell.eu/Newsletter.html

2010-12-10T21:36:00.001-08:00

Just Have Fun and Enjoy Your Life!!

We all complain about our lives from time to time. An unexpected expense comes up or we get laid off from our jobs. So many things can happen to us in even just one day. Unfortunately, complaining is a waste of time. It is a grown up version of whining, and yes, we too have tantrums. The key to enjoying life is in how we react to the events and mishaps in our daily lives.

Expat Royal Wedding Fever

2010-12-08T22:00:00.000-08:00

According to an article in The Telegraph this week, there has been a significant surge in flight searches within the Netherlands for the dates around THE royal wedding planned for 2011.

For those of you living under stones or who have been incommunicado in recent weeks, the British crown prince, Prince William, is due to marry Kate Middleton on April 29 2011. It is the first royal wedding of interest since Prince William's father married Lady Diana Spencer in 1981 (and no I won't say "and look at how that turned out").

Is this surge in flight searches British expats scrambling to get back to the UK for the big event? Or does it reflect wedding-happy Dutch travellers keen to compare this British royal wedding to the Dutch royal wedding of Maxima and Willem-Alexander?

The fact that so many Brits are looking to escape the UK around the time of the wedding and take advantage of the additional time off work might give us a clue......

Who's heading back for the royal wedding? Anyone? Or are you staying put to celebrate Queen's Day like only the Dutch can? Any Dutch expats in Britain planning to head to London for Kate and William's special day?

Rent or Adopt a Christmas Tree

2010-12-05T22:00:00.000-08:00

Now that Sinterklaas is on his way back to Spain, those of you with Dutch partners will be allowed to set up your Christmas tree (at least that is how it works in our household - something about it being sacrilegious to put up a tree when the dear St Nicholaas and his Pieten have not yet visited).

Every year we traipse in search of a prize specimen to grace our front room, hoping that the tree we pick will actually last until we have seen the new year in and doesn't lose so many needles that we are still finding them under the sofa at Easter. For this reason we have actually considered an artificial tree until we see the price of the things, and wonder where we will store it in our 'loftless' house. So each year we end up getting a real tree - though still not exactly cheap. I also can't help considering the environmental impact of this tree that sits in our house for a month. One of millions chopped every year......

According to www.milieucentraal.nl, there is little between an artificial tree and a real tree when it comes to is environmental friendliness - they just have different impacts. Of course an artificial tree can never give off the seasonal, festive smell of the pine needles of a real one; an artificial tree does of course mean you are not extracting pine needles out of your feet for six months of the year....

One suggestion on www.milieucentraal.nl is to rent a Christmas tree - this gives the tree a longer life as it can be used three to five times before its life is over. The idea is that you pay a 'statiegeld' (yep, like you do with some bottles) and after Christmas you deliver (or it gets picked up) the tree back for it to be replanted. This is popular with companies.

You can also adopt a tree, returning it every year to the kwekerij where it is replanted and looked after so you can pick it up again the following year. Visit http://www.adopteereenkerstboom.nl/ for more information.

Guest Post: Robin Pascoe looks back on her visits to Holland

2010-12-01T22:00:00.000-08:00

Author, inspirational speaker, writer, mother of third culture kids, traveller and once an accompanying spouse. Many words to describe my guest blogger today. Two words sum it up better: Expert expat. I am delighted that Robin Pascoe has written a guest blog for A Letter from the Netherlands - here she takes a look back at her visits to Holland. Over to Robin.......

I decided this past year to stop traveling around the world on speaking tours primarily because I had visions of people saying, is she still doing that? But I overlooked one huge downside to my decision:

I wouldn’t be visiting Holland on a regular basis anymore!

When my husband left diplomatic service for the private sector and we repatriated to Vancouver, Canada, I never figured I would lecture ever again. Until one day, in our first year back and out of the clear blue, I had a fax (yes, that’s how long ago it was) from my original publisher in Singapore: a group in The Hague called “Outpost” was interested in inviting me to Holland to keynote their first Global Conference.

Immediately, I called my best friend who was living in Holland at the time and asked her to investigate just who this Outpost group might be. At the same time, I played a heavy guilt card on my husband (who was travelling more, if that was possible, in his new job) that it was time for me to have a go at getting out of town.

Shell Outpost as everyone knows, became the role model for all the corporate spousal organisations that have followed since. It turned out that a survey had revealed my very first book about being an expat wife was very popular with Shell spouses. Who knew? Not me. I always have claimed I have a life I don’t personally participate in!

Shell kicked off for me over ten years of coming over to Holland from my side of the world to speak to so many groups, I had to really think hard to remember them all.

There was the Royal Tropical Institute (KIT) in the early days; the American School of the Hague (twice); and the International School of Amsterdam (also twice). Expatica.com, a great site I contributed articles to on a regular basis, organised a conference or two (I think one was in Rotterdam).

Then there were the women’s clubs: the American Women’s Club of Amsterdam (twice); Global Connection (also twice); Connecting Women in The Hague; the European Professional Women’s Network and of course, Shell Outpost in The Hague (too many times to remember after that initial conference).

The list (and I know I’m forgetting others) doesn’t do justice, though, to how much fun I always had visiting Holland and how much I miss it.

From my very first trip, where I insisted (even knowing I have no sense of direction), “oh, please don’t go to the bother of picking me up at the airport” because I would rather catch a train and go in the opposite direction of The Hague... to my last one, when my non-stop KLM flight back to Vancouver was the only flight on the board at Schipol Airport to be cancelled that day.

Robin travelling in traditional style in Amsterdam

There was also the time I met over lunch with my Google doppelganger, the British journalist living in Holland also named Robin Pascoe and then wrote a funny piece about ‘meeting myself’ for a Canadian newspaper.

Finally, they say a picture is worth a thousand stories. This one of me sitting in a Dutch bakfiets which was my means of transport to my AWC meeting by my hostess made it to the cover of my re-issued wife book. I was certainly glad my hostess was very fit as I watched the streetcars whiz by me in the opposite direction.

Too many stories (Queen’s Day celebrations one year in Hilversum would be an entire blog posting on its own) and too many memories (most of them involving getting lost!)

One day, I simply must get back, as my good friend and partner-in-expat-writing crime Jo Parfitt is living in The Hague inspiring new authors.

And where does her husband work? Shell, of course. What goes around definitely comes around!

Author and ExpatExpert Robin Pascoe doesn’t travel anymore so she created an on line global lecture tour at www.youtube.com/robinpascoe

Are you an English Speaking Expat who has Bought a House in Holland?

2010-11-29T22:00:00.000-08:00

House Hunters International is looking for English speaking expats who have gone through the house buying process here in the last few years.

House Hunters International is a half-hour program currently airing on the Home and Garden Television Network (HGTV). The program is a spin-off of the popular House Hunters and has spent the last several seasons exploring the idiosyncrasies of buying real estate in other countries. HHI is about a personal journey of discovery and the making of life-long dreams.

The series is designed to de-mystify the international home-buying process by going behind the scenes of a house hunt where buyers and their real estate agents tour 3 homes. At its core, House Hunters International is a travel show concentrating on the idiosyncrasies of the locales and what makes them special and different. A great deal of effort will be made to capture rich visuals and to provide sequences where viewers will be exposed to local vistas, traditions, lifestyles and architecture.

If you are interested in being profiled please contact Michelle James at michellejames_at_leopardfilms.com.

What no Dutch or British Heritage?

2010-11-28T22:00:00.000-08:00

Flamenco Dresses by Simon Gurney

What do throat singing, French food, carpet weaving, flamenco, hopping through the streets and oil wrestling have in common? They are all new additions to UNESCO's Lists of Intangible Cultural Heritage. UNESCO's world heritage sites I knew about - this list is a whole new ball game.

These lists have been compiled for the fifth time and incorporate threatened traditions and cultural activities across the world. Sixteen such traditions have been placed on the 'List of Intangible Cultural Heritage in Need of Urgent Safeguarding' (I seriously couldn't make this stuff up).

I am happy however to report that our neighbours, Belgium, has had three cultural events added to the list: Houtem Jaarmarkt (the annual winter fair and livestock market at Sint-Lievens-Houtem), Krakelingen and Tonnekensbrand, (an end-of-winter bread and fire feast at Geraardsbergen) and the Aalst carnival. The gastronomic meal of the French has taken pride of place on the list and has attracted a lot of comment form the world's media. Iran and Spain have also been significant contributors.

Here's the explanation from the press release from UNESCO about the French dinner:
"France - The gastronomic meal of the French - The gastronomic meal of the French is a customary social practice for celebrating important moments in the lives of individuals and groups, such as births, weddings, birthdays, anniversaries, achievements and reunions. It is a festive meal bringing people together for an occasion to enjoy the art of good eating and drinking. The gastronomic meal emphasizes togetherness, the pleasure of taste, and the balance between human beings and the products of nature."

Like what fonduing is to the Dutch then? Hmmm.....

However, on the list of additions for 2010, there is nothing for the Netherlands and the United Kingdom has also contributed zilch to the list. In fact, I can't find any submissions in the last three years (and can't find any list before that) by either my host or home country. Are the Dutch and British without cultural heritage worthy of the list? What about clog dancing, windmill building, morris dancing and beer making? The British pub lunch? Dutch snacks - the renowned bitterballen? I could go on....... amusing myself... but instead I'll ask you...

What Dutch or British cultural heritage do you think should be on these lists?

Keeping a Ford Mondeo Together the Dutch Way?

2010-11-24T22:00:00.000-08:00

This post may seem a little off topic but I have to ask. Is it just me or are Ford Mondeos on Dutch roads all held together with duct tape? It seems like any Ford Mondeo in this country comes with free (black or grey) duct tape which can be optionally used on the front or back bumpers. It may even be a mandatory thing only known about by Mondeo owners.

Is this a Dutch phenomena or is it worldwide?

To answer this question I googled Mondeo and duct tape - and guess what.... there is a whole world out there that non-Mondeo car owners are excluded from. It is a known thing.... and there are 'ford and gaffer tape' appreciation societies and fora. It is bizarre. Apparently there is no known reason for the strange phenomena....... these particular Ford bumpers just break easily but with love and tender patching can continue for years in a less than perfect state.

Next time you are out and about, take a moment to check out any Ford Mondeos you come across.... report back if they have been patched up with duct tape. Better still, if you are a Mondeo owner, share your bumper tales with us.....

"Komt Een Vrouw bij de Dokter" - The Book

2010-11-21T01:36:00.000-08:00

As I crept in to bed sniffing and snottering my husband asked,

"Finished your book then?"

Yes I had. I had just turned the final page over of 'Komt een Vrouw bij de Dokter' written by Kluun (aka Raymond van de Klundert). This is Kluun's debut novel written in 2003 and is dramatised from events in his own life.

It's a funny thing to enjoy a book which evokes gut wrenching tears but enjoy it I did. Well, when I say enjoy... I mean I found it hard to put down, I emphasised with the characters and I experienced their pain. That's what a good book should do right - put you into someone else's world?

When I woke the next morning I had puffed up red eyes and I was glad the book was finished. Myrna Goossen (Aperitivo) sums it up perfectly, "Man, man, wat een heftig book."

Komt een vrouw bij de doktor is a book about Stijn and Carmen living in Amsterdam in the prime of their life, both running their own companies, enjoying the night life of the Dutch capital city, surrounded by success and friends. Until they are struck by breast cancer.

This book is their journey through cancer, about how it rips at the heart of their family and confronts her close friends. It is written from the perspective of Stijn, a fun loving, philandering, emotionally challenged husband as he faces up to the reality that his wife is terminally ill. It is a book about preparing for the end, an ode to love and the strength of family. The book is a roller coaster of emotion from anger at the medical establishment, to hope brought by treatment options, desperation as the effects of chemo take hold, to the final realisation that Carmen won't see their young daughter, Luna grow up. It is a heart wrenching read, and all the more because it is based on real events.

Be prepared for humour and tears.

For those whose Dutch is in progress..... the book is available in English with the title "Love Life" by Ray Kluun. It has also been made into a very successful film of the same title starring Carice van Houten, Barry Atsma and Pierre Bokma. You can see the trailer on zie.nl.

A book sequel entitled "Widower" is also available (though I am yet to read it but it is on my reading list for sure).

Expat Christmas Gift Ideas (4): English Language Books

2010-11-17T22:00:00.000-08:00

Still on the theme of Christmas presents; today all about books. Living in a country where books are not in English by default, books in English are always appreciated. My Amazon wish list plays an important role at Christmas and birthday time.

So, if you are buying a present for an expat friend or family member then consider a book. For expats buying for loved ones overseas, books work too, especially if you combine it with the idea of sharing what it is like in your host country. Here's what I mean:

Learn more about life in the Netherlands through books such as The Undutchables, My 'Dam Life, Bicycle Mania Holland
Learn about life in the UK with books such as Notes from a Small Island, Rules, Britiannia
You couldn't share life as an expat in Germany any better than giving Planet Germany as a gift
Entertain and share what expat life is like in general through musings in books like Diplomatic Incidents: The Memoirs of an (Un)diplomatic Wife, A Moving Landscape, I'm A Stranger Here Myself

You get the picture...

And great news on the subject of buying English language books - Amazon is now offering free delivery from the UK website to many European countries, including the Netherlands. Check the site for conditions.

Expat Christmas Gift Ideas (3): Expat Shops

2010-11-16T22:00:00.000-08:00

Continuing the series about tips for Christmas gifts for expats...... Expat shops are a great port of call for present shopping for your expat and local friends and family alike.

How about making up a basket of British products for your in-laws? Or putting together a hamper of flavours from the US for your American expat friend? Christmas can be a great opportunity to introduce your local friends to the tastes of your home country - like a beer selection from home or a pudding for the Christmas meal or something special for breakfast on Boxing Day. Or just to make sure they experience the delights of crumpets at least once in their life.

Lots of expats have food parcels sent to them all year long so making up an extra special package at Christmas time will certainly go down well and your local expat shop will be able to help you.

If you are British, and want to introduce your local family and friends to something new.... try mince pies. Not only do they get to experience a new taste - but you get to have a whole conversation about minced beef as a dessert...... which of course is not what mince pies are (although to be fair in some countries ask for a mince pie and you will get a ground beef pie). The British traditionally eat mince pies in the festive period around Christmas and the New Year - and in the lead up to Christmas the shops are full of them. British expat shops are no exception.

Mince pies are sweet pastries full of mincemeat. Nothing related to a cow but instead dried fruits such as raisins and sultanas and apples with spices. They are delicious. Particularly with brandy butter or single cream. And more importantly, they are a favourite of Father Christmas, who appreciates children leaving him a mince pie along with a glass of sherry on Christmas eve.

If you have never had a mince pie, like the idea of sharing a British tradition with your friends and family here in the Netherlands, or just want to stock up on your usual treat at Christmas, then hold on to your hats....... For those of you living within a commute of The Hague there is a very special offer for readers of this blog at Kelly's Expat Shop.... A FREE BOX OF KIPLING MINCE PIES when you spend 15 euro on shopping at Kelly's. Just quote A Letter from the Netherlands blog at the till. That simple!

Kelly is actually Dutch (read a previous article of mine if you want more on the interesting tale about a Dutchie running an expat shop) but provides the expat community of The Hague and surrounding areas with goodies from Britain, America, South Africa, Australia and more. Open seven days a week, Kelly's is located at Piet Heinstraat 105 but also offers online shopping for delivery in the surrounding area. Incidentally you can also get your Christmas turkey from Kelly's. What are you waiting for?

Christmas Gift Ideas for Expats (2): Giftware with a Conscience

2010-11-15T22:00:00.000-08:00

Christmas gifts with a conscience? Yes, if you support British expat Figen Cakir's project. Figen, who lives in Turkey, has set up a project aimed at developing local skills and ultimately selling items that have been made by local women, artisans and craftspeople. All so that they can support their families and rebuild their lives after a disastrous earthquake hit her community over a decade ago.

Figen at London crafts show showing
Turkish wares

Figen is a great example of an expat helping their local community - making their 'host' country their home and contributing to it in a big way. Figen personally helps local women with the development of their crafts and arts and ensures that the products are sourced from local or natural materials. She wants to expand the support through this 'Giftware with a Conscience' project which will help set up a small shop to develop skills and turn unique skills into unique arts and crafts. Figen explains that it is not about giving the local people charity,

"The aim is to give them a sense of enterprise."

A website offering international shipping will accompany the shop. All donators will be added to the mailing list and will receive shop discounts, updates, special offers and details of monthly or bi-monthly initiatives to help the local community - things like helping a family with clothing for their children, school books, baby items or things to help get them through the winter.

Turkish oya

VIP perks for funders include hand knitted Turkish slippers for toasty feet on cold winter days, decorative plates, hand painted gift tags, Turkish tile ware and pure Turkish cotton towels.

Cini Tilework

*CHRISTMAS TIP* - I would like to share a great idea with you that I got from Jo Parfitt. Jo sends a Christmas newsletter out instead of sending Christmas cards. The money she would have spent on cards and stamps she donates to charity. A great idea! If this appeals to you, and you like the idea of Figen's project consider donating the money you save on cards and postage to 'Giftware with a Conscience'.

Alternatively, put this project on your own Christmas wish list so that your friends and family donate on your behalf.

So many ways to give gifts this year with a conscience.

I will leave the last word to Figen, who sums up what this means to her, and to her community.

"I would like to express my desire to see this project come to life in the new year and finally create a 'home' for the work of artisans and craftspeople. That would be my Christmas wish, I guess."

Expat Christmas Gift Ideas (1): Name Art

2010-11-14T22:00:00.000-08:00

I can personally recommend Name Art gifts as I have ordered a couple of gifts for my own children, namely pictures commemorating their birth and they are hung proudly in their bedrooms.

Charis Slade designs a range of gifts that incorporate names into the design - they are fab and unique gifts. Name Art is UK based so is a particularly great idea if you want to send unique gifts to family or friends based in the UK. Note that she also ships overseas.

This sums up Name Art -

"Charis, a mum of two boys and previously a primary school teacher, began her business creating gifts for newborns - incorporating their names into striking images of teddies, toys and animals. From their studio near Bath, Name Art now apply her designs to canvases, t-shirts, plaques, cards and aprons. Making beautiful, thoughtful and personal gifts.

Charis has a passion for creating unique products that reflect children's favourite interests. Tractors, fairies, football, horses, dinosaurs, pirates, ballet - take a look, the words are hidden in the pictures!

Her favourite commissions involve personalising a design by incorporating the child's name into a picture of something they love. Personalised designs are hand drawn and adapted to your exact requirements, so that no two pieces will ever be the same. Children love this!"

Expat Christmas Gift Ideas

2010-11-13T21:00:00.000-08:00

With Sinterklaas and Christmas fast approaching I thought a few posts were in order about finding the perfect Christmas present for expats to send back home for friends and family, as well as gift ideas for the expats in your lives. Or maybe even gifts that let your local friends taste a little of your life back home.

When you live abroad, it is not always easy to find the right gift for family and friends - and then of course you need to ship it or carry it when you travel back. Often you end up spending more on postage and packing than the cost of the gift itself.

Shopping online can therefore be a great solution for Christmas shopping for expats - especially if you can get it delivered directly to your friends or family from within the same country. Over the next few days I will share some great, unique gift ideas I have found over the last few years.

For the expat in your life there are also ideas to help bring a little piece of home to their host country... and if you are an expat yourself you could use the festive period to introduce your local in-laws or friends to a little of your life back home.

Tomorrow kicks off with Name Art - gift ideas for friends and family back home, particularly those in the UK. During the week there is also a very special offer for readers of A Letter from the Netherlands!!

Mind Your Ps and Qs Please - I'm British

2010-11-11T04:12:00.000-08:00

Photo: Ramzi Hashisho

As mentioned in my blog post last week, I have been watching the Dutch version of Top Chef every day on RTL. However, I was shocked last night as I watched Tuesday's episode (we tape it and watch it when we get the chance so run a little behind....) and heard profanities from Omar's mouth that I hadn't expected to hear on a cooking show broadcast at 7pm. Along with uttering the 'f word' many times, he then combined it with the 'c word' which was a step too far for me.

I grew up with the BBC watershed, which means that any program shown on the BBC before 9pm is suitable for everyone. This means you will not hear 'strong language' (i.e. swearing and vulgar language) before 9pm. Even after 9pm I have a problem with the vocabulary used in Tuesday's program. I am not generally a prude and I don't have too much of a problem with many swear words but there is a limit.

Much of it is because I am English so when the Dutch use such strong language in English it means more to me than the average Dutchman. The same is true the other way round - if you swear in Dutch it's just a funny word if you are not a native. However, I really struggle to see why such bad language was not edited out of such a show - does swearing on that scale really enhance a cooking show?

What are you used to hearing on TV in your home country? What do you think about Dutch TV and the language used?

Mama and Papa or Mummy and Daddy?

2010-11-07T22:00:00.000-08:00

Photo: Dirk Herrmann

An interesting post caught my eye on the networking site Insego this week. A member asked if other parents preferred to be called mama or papa, like the Dutch use, or whether other expats preferred to use the terms of their native language - so in my case mummy and daddy. It struck a chord because it is something I have thought about since becoming a parent.

I speak English to my sons. The idea is that they speak (and in the case of my youngest, will speak) English back to me. However, my eldest calls me mama, which is what he learnt to call me from me and his 'papa'. I never really thought anything of the term mama, nor particularly consciously decided on mama instead of mummy, until one day my son called me mummy. And it felt weird. it somehow did not fit.

He had called me mama since the day he could talk and after an extended trip to the UK, he came out suddenly with mummy. I didn't react instantly because it took a second to realise he was actually addressing me. I corrected him with "mama" and he looked confused. Everyone else in England had used mummy when referring to me - "Shall we see if your mummy wants to do that?" "Maybe ask your mummy before you eat that." So he had adopted it and begun using it back in Holland. To my dismay. And I still am not sure, even now, why it dismayed me. But it did. And he now, generally, calls me mama. Every now and then he reverts to mummy but it is so infrequent it doesn't bother me.

I think I got used to hearing mama from him so when he used mummy it sounded alien. However, there is also another part that prefers mama because it reminds me of who we are as a family. My children are Dutch and no matter what my nationality is, they are currently more Dutch than English. And so, somehow, it seems more natural for them to call me mama.

What do your children call you? Do you use terms from your host or birth country?

Bonfire Night - Thwarting An Early Terrorist Threat

2010-11-05T07:01:00.000-07:00

Wrapped up in woollen scarves, hats and gloves we would stand excitedly in the dark waiting for the lighting of the bonfire; for the moment when the flames would spring in to life and the wood would start to crackle, for the moment that we could feel the heat on our cold, red cheeks. The guy perched at the top of the fire would eventually fall and burn, the effort of making the figure disappearing literally in a puff of smoke.

Once the bonfire was in full flame, we would turn our excitement to the fireworks which would be next to start. In the meantime we warmed ourselves and filled our tummies with soup, a jacket potato or a hot dog or hamburger.

Then the firework display would start and the crowd would "ooh" and "aahhhh" in unison as Catherine Wheels spun, spider fireworks trailed their orange legs across the dark, starry sky and Roman Candles sent shooting stars heaven bound. We would wave our sparklers around, writing our names in light. The bangs, whistles, screeches and crackles echoed across each other as the firework show came to its finale.

Bonfire night every 5th November sticks with me, the date holding a feast of childhood memories like a t box of treasures I can open every year on this day. Of course, since I moved to the Netherlands participating in Bonfire night has become harder and I have only been in the UK to celebrate 5th November twice since 2000. As my children grow up this is a track record I aim to change so that they can learn and take part in a little piece of British history and culture. For Bonfire night is a British thing - yes, I have had lots of people back home saying to me over the years "Don't they celebrate bonfire night in Holland then?" No they don't. Of course they don't - Guy Fawkes made no attempt to blow up the Dutch parliament did he?

But he did have a cunning plan to get rid of the protestant monarch of the time by blowing up Parliament and King James I with it in 1605. The aim was to replace the head of state with a catholic one. Luckily for King James I the gunpowder plot was discovered (the anti-terrorist unit being on full alert back then too by all accounts) and the plotters were arrested and swiftly executed. End of Guy Fawkes and his friends.

On 5th November, 1605 the first 'thanksgiving' was celebrated and marked with the ringing of church bells and the lighting of bonfires. Hence, why the British, over 400 years later, still light bonfires on 5th November and put an effigy (the guy, named after Guy Fawkes) on top of the fire. The fireworks represent the foiled gunpowder plot - that and it's pretty.......

If you live in the Netherlands and want to experience Bonfire Night get yourself over to Watersportcentrum, Sloterplas,Christoffel Plantijngracht 4, 1065 DA Amsterdam at 16.00 on Sunday 7th November, where the British Society is once more organising its Guy Fawkes Bonfire event.

Top Chef - A Melting Pot in the Kitchen

2010-11-02T10:17:00.000-07:00

Kranenborg and Jaspers present RTL's nationwide search
for Top Chef 2010

Another set of contestants started this week on RTL's Top Chef, the Dutch version of the culinary contest to find an amateur marvel in the kitchen. If you haven't seen it tune in to RTL5 at 7pm every work day (or record it as we do because it's still bedlam in our house at 7pm.......) and catch up with Michelin star chef Robert Kranenborg and culinary expert Julius Jaspers - they are a funny duo to watch! And even more reason to watch - at the end of each week the pair take the contestants to a Michelin star restaurant in the Netherlands to cook under the beady eyes of top professionals like Nico Boreas and Mario Ridder.

But back to the point of this post...... Every week my husband and I play two guessing games whilst we are watching the first show of the week. The first is "Who will make it through to the next round?" which is a logical game for an elimination style competition. The second game is a less predictable game that you can play with a Dutch cooking program, namely "Guess the nationality of the contestant".

Now, obviously, the majority of the participants are Dutch. Very clearly Dutch. However, usually at least one contestant a week allows us to play guess the nationality.

This week Elvira, from Suriname, was an easy start (particularly as it was mentioned....) but Megy was a whole different ball game. Our first guess was "East Europe". Then it changed to "maybe a Southern Europe country..." Then we couldn't really decide. Turns out she is from Poland but she has lived in the Netherlands for eight years.

In previous weeks we have seen a Frenchman, an Italian, an Iranian and a Turk and another contestant who speaks at least six languages and has lived in various countries. Expats all. But all speaking Dutch, taking part in a television program and striving to become Top Chef Nederland 2010. The show's participants are as diverse as their cooking abilities and the origins of the food they are cooking up.

This show showcases one of the things I love about living in the Netherlands; the diverse, multicultural blend of people all doing it the Dutch way.

Duality - Life as an Expat

2010-10-24T21:00:00.000-07:00

"I am two different people for two different audiences," commented one reader of my recent guest post "How Do You Say.... Me?" on Expat Harem.

My post addressed the issue of being able to let the real you shine through when you are interacting with people in a second language. It is a difficulty that many expats face, and the comments from readers were overwhelming. So many of us endure the same struggles of showing our real personality when the words to express ourselves escape us.

"I can't express the totality of me in English," summed up another reader.

Expat Sarah Turnbull, in her book Almost French, states after a dinner party,

"I’d said very little all night. When I did speak, it was to issue childlike statements or ask simple questions which made me cringe at my own dumbness.”

This rang a bell with one reader of the blog post,

"I had to laugh at the "cringe at my own dumbness" quote because I find myself constantly doing that here in Italy."

Whilst many of us know the problems associated with learning a new language, this blog post made me realise that there is an undercurrent of issues too when you need to operate in a new language. It is not just grammar, getting by in daily life and understanding the society you live in - it is also about being able to feel like you represent yourself accurately and that you can be true to yourself and your persona in another language.

So how else can you get your message across when you can't find the words?

"Because the Turks are so expressive with their body language I think that really helps me to be more demonstrative if the word escapes me," explains one expat in Turkey.

Another expat says,

"I'm a smiler so I do that a lot! And I try to speak with my hands.... and my hubby can translate but its not the same."

You can of course refuse to budge and speak only in your native language but remember that whilst you are doing that, you are addressing an audience in a language not their own. So do they really get what you are about when you speak in your mother tongue?

There is no easy answer but as Anastasia Ashman puts it,

"Passion is something that will push us to the next stage in trying to communicate." And if there is something that most of us expats have - it's passion!!

*This was first published in February 2010 in an Expats@Home newsletter. If you want to receive future editions of my newsletter you can sign up on this blog (see right column) or http://www.thewritingwell.eu/Newsletter.html.*

Expat Tastes

2010-10-20T21:00:00.000-07:00

I was recently having a bit of a twitter with a Dutch expat in England and she was telling me that every time someone comes to visit, or she comes back to the Netherlands, she raids Albert Heijn for essential supplies to take back.

"I'm curious," I tweeted. "What type of things do you get?" She replied,

"Well half the Albert Heijn! Cheese, ontbijtkoek, hagelslag, crisps (hamkaas, bugels) and I miss all vleeswaren - osseworst etc." "Oh, and magazines," she added.

I tweeted back,

"That's hilarious!! I bring back English cheese and 'proper' flavour crisps... and magazines & books. Funny what you get used to!!"

So we agreed she would send a lorry of English supplies over, and I would send it back full of Dutch goodies.A kind of Tesco - Albert Heijn shopping exchange scheme......

The idea of a Dutch expat lugging Dutch cheese over to England at the same time I was hauling a good piece of English cheddar back to the Netherlands made me smile and as her Albert Heijn trolley is filling with hamkaas and bugles, mine is filling with prawn cocktail and worcester sauce flavour crisps.

I do bring a lot less variety of things back with me each trip than I used to but there are still staples that the local Dutch supermarket just doesn't stock, so they go on list when we pop back or someone comes over:

jelly cubes
Branston pickle
Ambrosia rice pudding
custard
bite-size shredded wheat
crumpets
Bisto gravy granules

To sum it up she wrote,

"You can take the Dutch out of Holland but you can't take Holland out of the Dutch!"

Indeed, and you can certainly say the same about the English. Though it did make me wonder what foods I would miss from the Netherlands if I left..........

8 Things the Dutch do Better than the English

2010-10-17T21:00:00.000-07:00

Inspired by a brilliant blog post on Smitten by Britain about things that Brits do better than Americans, here are eight things that the Dutch could teach the English a thing or two about.

1. Celebrating Defeat
Never mind that the Dutch lost to the Spaniards in the World Cup 2010 final - the after party was amazing. For one afternoon, everyone actually forgot that the Dutch had not brought the World Cup home. The English on the other hand, particularly the media, would have slaughtered the English team for losing the final. The English revel in defeat - it gives them something to moan about.

2. National Holidays
When the Dutch party on a national scale, the Dutch really party. The Queen's birthday (which isn't actually the Queen's birthday) is all the excuse the Dutch need to celebrate. The country turns orange, is adorned with flags and everyone takes to the streets. The English like to pace themselves, celebrating in this fashion perhaps once every 25 years coinciding with a jubilee of the British Queen. The last knees up was in 1977. The next one is 2012. St. George's day, the national day of England, is still lacking any form of real celebration.

3. Telling It Like It is
The dutch don't hold back when it comes to speaking their mind. If they think it, they say it. Known for their bluntness, the Dutch make the English look like stuttering fools in the department of expressing their thoughts.

Photo: Luca Baroncini

4. Balancing Work and Life
The Dutch have got work life balance down to a fine art. Not that they are slackers. Not at all. It's just that whilst the English are contemplating life over their second cup of coffee at the breakfast table, the Dutch are already at their desks. And have been for hours. It means they can leave the office earlier and spend time with their families in the late afternoon/ early evening. The English have a long hours work culture - the longest work week in Europe in fact. Guess who are happier.....

Photo: Keith Syvinski

5. Greeting Strangers
From doctors' and dentists' waiting rooms to elevators, the Dutch don't hesitate to greet the entire waiting room or lift as they come in - loudly and confidently. The English on the other hand are masters of pretending that no other human being exists within a radius of half a kilometre. They put their heads down and stare at their feet. Should any sound pass their lips it is a bumbling mumble.

6. Flowers
The Dutch do flowers so much better than the English. In fact, the Dutch do flowers better than any other nation. They don't need an excuse or special occasion to adorn their houses with flowers. Dutch men don't need a reason to buy the women in their lives flowers. They are cheap and in abundance. The Dutch have made a tourist industry (as well as an economy) out of flowers. Many English men however, still think they need a reason to give their partners flowers and usually use them as an apology.....

7. Taking the Work Out of Dinner Parties
When the Dutch host dinner parties they cleverly leave the cooking to their guests by getting the fondue out or 'gourmetting'. The English make hard work of at least a three course meal.

8. Post-Natal Care
Supplying a maternity nurse for the week after childbirth is part of the course in the Netherlands. Every mother is entitled to post-natal care that makes other nations green with jealousy. In England you are sent home from the hospital after a few days and left to discover the essentials of baby care for yourself.

Cleaning up the Streets

2010-10-13T21:00:00.000-07:00

Photo: L van Mulligen

Residents in the West Midlands in the UK have been slapped on the wrist by their local council for collecting leaves from outside their homes and putting them in their recycle bins. Yes, the residents had the nerve to put the collected leaves in their rubbish bins..... and this is against council rules. Hot on recycling, the council workmen admonished local pensioners for the way they had disposed of the leaves stating that this caused 'contamination'.

Council guidelines state "grass cuttings, plant clippings, weeds and leaves from residents' own gardens can be put into the brown bins." The brown bins are the equivalent of our green bins here in the Netherlands.

In theory the council comes round here to clean the leaves from the streets here but their visits cannot possibly keep up with the leaf fall in the autumn. The solution in my area? Leaf cages - a bladkorf - placed on public roads for residents to dispose of leaves on public footways and roads without having to fill up their own green bins.

This was introduced last year, and to my surprise worked very well. The cages were regularly filled with leaves and the council regularly emptied them. An idea for West Midlands council? If people want to keep their streets clean, tidy and safe should councils really be slapping them on the wrists and discouraging it?

Rutte, Verhagen and Wilders - New Dutch Politics

2010-10-10T22:00:00.000-07:00

The Dutch governments of recent years remind me of a smashed vase that has been glued back together; it serves its purpose in the short term but you know eventually it will leak and you'll replace it.

Coming from what has been traditionally a two party political system, the norm of an unstable Dutch multi-party coalition during the last few years automatically feels alien to me. The current coalition in the UK is also alien to me, but does at least seem stable and took no time at all for it to be formed.

However, here we are four months after the general election and we have just got a new government. Furthermore, Mark Rutte's efforts at forming a government instil me (and much of the Dutch population) with little confidence about the government's longevity. There has been months of discussion, debate and disagreement. He has tried every coalition possibility available and the final result is disappointing to many. Oh, and the CDA is already split before the new government really gets going......

What do you think about the latest political landscape in the Netherlands? Should Geert Wilders have an important role in the decision making of the Dutch government? Was this the right way to go? What will it mean for the Netherlands?

Expat Entrepreneur Inspiration

2010-10-06T22:00:00.000-07:00

One of the wonderful things about expat life is the network of people you build along your journey. Every now and then, (actually quite often I find) there is someone that crosses your path that is worth shouting about.

Last August, I was inspired to write about a few of the amazing women I have come into contact with over the years I have been living an expat life (and you can read A World of Inspiration: A Patchwork Quilt on Velvet Escape). I have yet again been inspired to write about another expat; an expat entrepreneur who not only takes her own photography business seriously but her social responsibility too.

Natalie's Award from the WBII
Photo: Natalie Carstens

In fact, the Dutch based Women's Business Initiative International (WBII) has just awarded British expat Natalie Carstens with the Social Innovation Award for her exceptional contribution to the social projects she involves herself with. I decided to talk to her about the projects she works on, and about expat life.

Natalie photographed by her
husband, Heiko Carstens

Natalie came to the Netherlands just over six years ago whilst completing her Masters degree. Her career looked much different back in the UK she explains:

"I was a full time student. For my Bachelors degree in Information Engineering and Technology Management I spent a one-year internship with the UK Ministry of Defence. As a result of my internship I received sponsorship for a Masters degree in Information Security and Computer Crime."

Whilst the Netherlands is Natalie's first experience of expat life, she has certainly not been afraid of change. I asked her how she came to make such a dramatic career switch from IT to photography and she happily recalls:

"I discovered IMAGES International Photography Club and joined straightaway. I loved photography and thought it would be a great way to meet people outside of work. It wasn’t long before I joined the Committee and I spent three and a half enjoyable years filling the roles of Website Editor, Publicity Officer and Chairman. Quite unexpectedly I discovered something I loved with my heart and soul."

It was not an easy decision to leave secure employment and start up for herself, but convinced that she should follow her passion she set up Tigs Creations in 2008 and hasn't looked back.

She says, "Now I work full time as a children and family portrait photographer, specialising in pregnancy and newborn portraiture."

But she also involves herself in much more, namely two social projects that are closely linked to her photography: The Littlest Heroes and Zoocrew.eu. I asked Natalie to tell a little about these projects, and how she came to be a part of them:

The Littlest Heroes Project. Photo by Natalie Carstens

"The Littlest Heroes Project is non-profit organisation made up of a network of professional photographers worldwide that have come together to help give back and capture miracles through the beauty of photography. The project provides our littlest heroes (children who suffer from any type of serious illness of life altering disability) and their family with a complimentary photo session and selection of photos. This is an amazing gift for these families that are dealing with hectic schedules as their child battles disease and sickness. When I first came across the website I could not hold back the tears. The stories and images of these brave children (including the story of the founder of the project) really tugged at my heartstrings and I knew instantly I wanted to be a part of this very special project."

She goes on to tell about zoocrew.eu:

Photo: Natalie Carstens

"The idea behind zoocrew.eu came from four photographer friends with a shared passion for wildlife. We were regularly visiting zoos together and day trips turned into weekends away to visit zoos that were further away. Each zoo visit sparked a discussion about the variety and health of the animals, the quality of the enclosures etc. and during one of our discussions we realised the importance of promoting the conservation projects and breeding programmes that are funded and supported by the various zoos. After some brainstorming the idea for the zoocrew.eu project became more and more a reality and my husband and I launched the website in January 2008."

One of the photos from the romantic portrait session offered for Helping Hearts. Photo by Natalie Carstens

Natalie was also moved to help the victims of the recent earthquake in Haiti. She offered a romantic portrait session on-location as a prize to one of her blog readers who donated to the Dutch National Giro555, as part of the Helping Hearts for Haiti initiative.

For Natalie, involvement in social projects is a natural activity:

"I’ve never really questioned ‘why’; it’s more something that I do on impulse. If I feel passionate about something I like to find a way I can help."

She explains that taking social responsibility is not only good on a personal level and for those less fortunate, but can also be good for your own business,

"Supporting a social project enriches businesses and opens doors. Some projects may also present new business opportunities as well as the chance to grow your network further."

Her advice for others who would like to get involved in a social project? Simply...

"Choose a social project that tugs at your heart and go ahead and support it!"

What are you waiting for?

*This was first published in April 2010 in the Expats@Home series of newsletters. If you want to receive future copies of my newsletter you can sign up in the right hand column on this blog or read more on my website http://www.thewritingwell.eu/Newsletter.html.*